Archive for January 2013

Super Bowl Sunday is my Fantasy Football

This blog contains a story and it’s a mostly true story too! I can’t say that it is 100% true, because my memory of past events is furry. No, the word furry isn’t a typo. You see, my memories always includes dog hair, hence I use the word furry, and also the word hence, because... Read more »

Welcome to the Good Moms Club

Calling all moms – Specifically those of you who have been campaigning for the position of President of the Bad Moms Club. Good moms can stay and read too, but really is there such thing as a good mom? From what I can see, the whole lot of us suck. First of all, I just... Read more »

A Guilt Free Guide to Charitable Giving in 2013

Cub Scouts, Breast Cancer, Brownies and Little League Baseball players – they all want your money. Premature babies, Veterans, Firefighters and Abandoned animals – the want a piece of you too! Volunteers desperately needed. And supplies. And people who can transport animals. Oh, and for god sake if you can give your time, treasures and... Read more »
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No Child Left Behind

I want my kids to know things. All the things! I don’t want them to be left behind! No child left behind must include my beloved loin fruit and the only way I will know if they are indeed ahead and not behind, is to ask them. I have to pay attention! I am constantly... Read more »

Why you must set and maintain firm boundaries with your children

I love chocolate. I need it. Chocolate is my family. Specifically dark chocolate, which I know seems odd that I’d be so closely related to something dark when I am frequently asked if I’m an albino, but it’s true. Dark chocolate is a part of me. I am dark chocolate and dark chocolate is me.... Read more »

Let's talk about SEX

DO I HAVE YOUR ATTENTION? Good, thought so. It’s a cheap trick really, using the word SEX the headline for this blog post, but I don’t care. SEX IS IMPORTANT. Talking to kids about sex is as important as talking to them about good nutrition, safety or why the sooner they learn that the worst,... Read more »
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Depression - S*&t that everyone should know

Trust me, I am a professional. I really am. Go ahead and look it up, I’ll wait. The vast amount of incorrect information, half truths, and overall crap that is available for our reading pleasure overwhelms me. I’m sure you feel the same sometimes. I ignore everything about the Kardashians because I’m not interested in... Read more »

Raising an American Girl

Raising an American Girl
This is my daughter. Holy shit what a big bag, right? Well, I didn’t pay the tab for the contents of that thing! My mother. I love her in a blind, stupid, overwhelming worship-y way. My mother-in-law. I love her too. And I respect her for her strength and tenacity and single-minded focus. However, it... Read more »

My name is Nikki and I'm a Pin-a-holic

Okay fine, Al. I'll own my Pinterest problem, seriously, whose really the bitch here? Vice President is second fiddle. If you ain't first, you are last, and I've always thought you were a dingbat of the worst kind.
The Internet is a time sucking menace. Menace! I’m pretty sure the social media site Pinterest is working some internet voodoo. There’s got to be some sort of subliminal sucking in code all meshed in with each image, because I swear to baby Jesus I can’t stop pinning random crap to all my cyber pin... Read more »
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Would you like fries with that? Why teenagers should have part time jobs

Would you like fries with that? Why teenagers should have part time jobs
A hot topic in the parenting world today is whether teens should work. Let me re-phrase that. A hot topic in the la-la land-parenting world is whether teens should work. La-di-da…… Of course they should work. Teenagers should do homework, chores, practice whatever thing they are doing for fun or sport. They should work on... Read more »