News from Sports DramaLand: King LeBron James Makes His Royal Move

Currently King James, as in LEBRON JAMES continues to dominate the Sports Dramaland. In case you are one of the few fortunate individuals who has managed to escape all of the “shout it from the rooftops hype” about him – here is the short version update:

Who is he? A Basketball Player. He is referred to as “King James”. (Note: He is NOT a King – again – he is a B A S K E T B A L L P L A Y E R.}

The King

The King


Yes – he has an impressive record for a BASKETBALL PLAYER – two championships under his belt and four MVP's and blah blah blah. (Another Note: He is still no rival for the real King of Basketball…King Jordan – as in Michael – Chicago Bulls – remember?)

So, because of his talent, he recently held court as a free agent in Las Vegas from his castle suite. Like a slam dunkin’ magnet, he entertained visitations from various teams from around the country. They crawled on their knees with their beasts of burden laden with sacks of gold in order to kiss his ring and woo him to their domains.

Let’s do a “visual”…The King is in his counting room counting all his money, and today….drum roll please, it is Cleveland, Ohio - The CAVALIERS - once again - you lucky dogs! He is feeling the love.

King James has chosen to play for the Cleveland Cavaliers where he can once again be a big fish in a little pond. Who-hoo. Who-hoo. And then Cha-Ching, Cha-Ching – the cash register chorus begins and THE CROWD GOES WILD.

The King makes this royal proclamation:

..Ohio - his home… "It’s where I walked. It’s where I ran. It’s where I cried. It’s where I bled,” he said.

Pass the Kleenex. Hmmm…So why did you leave Cleveland four years ago and go to Miami?

FYI: When he kicked Cleveland to the curb four years ago, he was called “disloyal, a narcissist, a coward, and a quitter." The team owner Dan Gilbert blasted him in an infamous letter for going to Miami. However, now it’s apparently all worship, gratitude and open arms as King Fickle negotiates his return to the Cavaliers. But I digress…

So, can you imagine – the press, the media, the social networking? Crazy-Insane-Over the Top. The suspense has ended and there is a winner: Cleveland – you are blessed. Of all the gin mills in the world – he walked into yours. (Apologies to Casablanca)

True testimony from a representative Cleveland resident where there is jubilation in the streets…

“No one in Cleveland has talked about anything else for days…every conversation, EVERY WHERE here has been about LeBron – the bars, the restaurants, the Laundromats – and now HE is coming back.”

Nothing else??? No Obama? No Middle East? No Bird Flu? No Emmy Nominations? Guess not.

All Hail the King! -

So I walked into the room, and saw that My Sports Guy is fixated on ESPN.

“What’s going on, honey?” I asked.

You know – it’s all about LeBron, he said with disdain. (Note: He is not a fan of the King.)

The Prodigal Son has returned to his home - so that he can bring them championships...so nostalgic - roots - family - buddies - oh and not to mention...THE MONEY - THE MAX MONEY - THE HIGHEST BIDDER MONEY... 21 Million Dollar Money per year. Sigh. He's feeling the love.

Such a warm and fuzzy story from Sports DramaLand.

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