Amazing Adventure #1 - My first blog entry

This is the very first entry of my very first blog. There should be a trumpet fanfare here but I’m pretty low-tech.  Doo do Doooooooooooooo.  There you go.

This entry has had me stymied for about 6 months.  How do you launch a blog?  I have no idea.  But I need to get this out there.  And, let’s face it, this first entry will just be read by my friends. There will be subsequent entries where I get all funny or poignant or something that will cause people to share with their friends and that’s how these things grow so this first entry really doesn’t matter.  Except it totally DOES because then those people who don’t know me and who like whatever entry I’ve written that was sent to them by a girl I went to high school with might say “Hmmm….let’s see what else she’s written…” and then they’ll come across this first entry in the archives.  The pressure, ya’ll.  The PRESSURE of beginning...

I generally love new beginnings.  Scary and exciting and full of possibility.  I get butterflies right along with my daughter every time a new school year starts.  I love the back-to-school shopping.  I love picking out folders with pictures of things she likes on the front.  I am transported to 1978 in those moments.  I’m dating myself.  Yeah…whatever…I’m 43.

I have always had a bit of wanderlust.  I get antsy when I stay put for too long. I hanker for something new and fresh.  My husband was a kindred spirit in that way. he did not stay put.  Sometimes it pays to have less in common with your mate.  Life lessons, baby.  This blog will be full of life lessons.

I am at a place where I am starting over pretty much from scratch…or, more accurately, I am starting over from a place where a little scratch with which to start over would be welcome.  And it is terrifying and sad….really quite sad.  But thanks to my love of new beginnings, there is also something really exciting about it.  Thank goodness.  What do those people who fear change do when their universe falls apart?  I don't know.  I worry.  Because the one thing I can tell you – as sure as I am sitting here at 8:03 on a Saturday morning banging out a blog entry I was supposed to write 6 months ago – is that the Universe will, at some point, slam down upon you and knock you off your chosen path.  It just will.  It has happened to me more than once and now it is your turn so watch your back.  (I gave the Universe your address - just to get her to move on.  Don't be mad.)  And, because she has a really caustic sense of humor, she, the Universe, will erase the path you were on before you can get back up and find it again.  So you’ll look around for a moment to see if you can find a new path you might like and when you spot it and begin walking toward it, the bitch will trip you.  She will.  So you'll crawl over to the nearest path you can find and you'll just start running on it…whatever the hell it is….just to get away from where you were.  And then you'll realize this path leads down into a huge, dark canyon and if you want to get back up to the light, you’ll have to ride a donkey.  Only you’re scared of donkeys.  Those teeth!  Am I right?

But the Universe dictates you gotta get on that donkey.  Embrace the donkey.  EMBRACE THE DONKEY.  Repeat that three times today.  Full voice.  In public.  It will change your life.

I don’t actually know if I’m scared of donkeys.  I was around some once on the day we scattered my mom’s ashes around a Girl Scout camp.  That probably sounds weird but she had been instrumental in raising the funding for a lot of the buildings.  It wasn’t like we thought, “Hey – wouldn’t it be funny to throw these ashes on a bunch of girl scouts?  Imagine the looks on their faces!”  But now that I think of it, that would be really funny.  Next time….

Look, I gotta wrap this up.  This blog will be about the thrilling, exciting adventure it is to suddenly be a 43-year-old single, custodial parent of two children.  It will be about the practical considerations of maintaining a life with half the money we used to live on.  I will most likely rant about random things that bug me – but the good news is, the angrier I get, the funnier I am.  So that’ll work out OK.  Occasionally an entry might be some sort of stream-of-conscious surrealist play and you'll be all like, "What the heck is this?!"  I'll tell you what it is.  It's ART.  Embrace it or you're a communist.

I promise at least one entry a week.  I promise that once a month I will have an entry that outlines an affordable adventure in the Chicagoland area that I will embark upon with my children, Bunny and Pip, (not their real names) – because affordable is where it’s at right now.  AND, because I work best with specific assignments and deadlines, I will take suggestions from you.  What do you want me to write about?  Leave it in the comment section and I’ll do my best…unless it’s stupid.

That’s it.  Find some fun today.

You guys? I seriously want to put a directive in my will about sprinkling my ashes on unsuspecting scouts.  Is that wrong?  Feel free to weigh in.

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    I got linked in by MTM. I normally keep my thoughts to myself but for some reason, what you wrote resonated deep in me.

    New beginnings are scary, and sometimes so devastating and heartbreaking. But like you said, new beginnings are also sometimes so rewarding and precious, and it leads you to the places you never dreamed of and never could even imagine.

    I wish you so much well on your new beginning.

    Four years ago, I found myself suddenly filing for a divorce from a man that went from my everything to someone that I didn't even know at all. Literally, in a day, I lost my house, my dog, my (step)child, and all sense of security. Suddenly, I found myself alone, a hundred gazillion miles away from home, absolutely and utterly lost just trying to put the pieces back together. Trying to figure out how I let myself down so terribly and trying to figure out how I just didn't see all of this coming. I was angry, I was confused, I was hurting, I was devastated.

    But here's the good part. You just have to take a deep breath, put one foot in front of the other, and if you believe in a God, you cling to that hoping desperately that there is a bigger picture in all of this that you are just not seeing. Sometimes, the life lessons just absolutely kick you in the ass.

    But sometimes, these life lessons also give birth to so much more.

    So why am I sharing intimate details of my past with my stranger? Because a long time ago, someone reached out to me and said, just hold on. It gets better. Just. Hold. On.

    And it did. So here I am, telling you, just hold on. It gets better.

    Welcome to your new normal, it may suck for a while, but it's going to give birth to something so much more....just you wait and see. You are always stronger than you think you are. Looking forward to reading about your new adventure and welcome to the crazy blogging world! :)

    Much love to you,

  • In reply to Racheal Khong:

    Thank you, Racheal. I'll get there. And one of these days I'll reach out to someone else like you reached out to me. Thank you.

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    I suggest you consider a nickname, like Mary Tyler Mom. But don't use that, people will be confused. My mom was a single mother for years when my sister and I were teenagers, and I'm looking forward to reading about your perspective on the whole thing.

  • Hahaha. I'd LIKE to be Mary Tyler Mom - cause I love her - but, yeah, I was really surprised y name was on there for awhile because I had put in a nickname. I'm still getting used to the technology. Thanks for reading!!

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    Funny I should just happen upon you today, of all days! As I was putting things away for winter, I was remembering this day 19 years ago, when I was 45, newly single, and responsible for EVERYTHING by myself. Today I was just thinking how much easier it would have been to have a sneak peek 19 years into the future. The good news is, I made it! Everybody grew up, I have a nice place to live, and food to eat. I am happy and content, and life is generally pretty sweet. If I could do it, I am sure you will too, probably even better! It will be hard, adjusting and all, and sometimes scary, but you are stronger than you think. I look forward to reading more!

  • In reply to Kathy Buehler:

    That is really really good to read! I'm glad you happened along. Thank you!

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    So freakin' awesome to read your writing! Can't wait for more.....

  • In reply to Jennifer Martin:

    I love you! Get together soon?

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    As a woman of the same age going through the same thing, I can't wait to read your adventures.

  • In reply to Elizabeth Trever:

    Elizabeth, we'll do this together. It's not a bad path at all, just one we weren't quite expecting. Thanks for reading!

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    Alright, I'm in B and P's Mama. You passed my ridiculously funny, yet true sniff test. Looking forward to more. PS: I live in California so Im more interested in you and less interested in fun & affordable things to do in Chicago.

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    LOVE IT!!! Thank you for your first blog & I am so much looking forward to more from you. I am 44 & found my life taking a different direction 4 years ago. Yeah, that was a birthday to remember. I am also custodial parent to two of the coolest girls ever, but it's still a struggle. My mantra for now is EMBRACE THE DONKEY!!!

    Oh, and I think sprinkling your ashes on the scouts is fabulous!

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    I don't think they were donkeys. I think they were mainly burros which are smaller. EMBRACE THE BURROS

  • In reply to Frances:

    Wait..."burro" isn't just the Spanish word for "donkey?" Are you trying to blow my mind? Still, Embrace the Donkey has a better ring. I sometimes will be loose on accuracy in the name of art. It's true.

  • Looking forward to this adventure.

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    In reply to MSW MOM:

    Well, aren't you spot on? Just started reading your blog (the divorce & cup of coffee entry) and you are absolutely RIGHT - I then had to go back and read your first post. Enjoyed it, as well, so nice job, even with all that pressure! Also, totally agree with your Ms. Universe analogy ~ the paths we all must take whether we want to or not!! Look forward to more of your entries . . .

  • In reply to Holly Scheuerle:

    Thank you!!

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