Spoiler Alert: Do not read if you haven’t seen Scandal Season 3, Ep. 15 – “Mama Said Knock You Out.”
“Glass houses, Olivia.” — Andrew
Last week Scandal brought us a classic love story full of passion and tragedy. This week it reverted back to the kind of twisted, painful love it delights to marinate in. The kind of love that enjoys drugging its paramours post-coital, creepily licking faces in the park and unknowingly blaming a rape victim for ruining a marriage.
The Grant children made their long awaited debut and they turned out to be the worst kind of children: teenagers. Really angsty, angry teenagers. So angsty and angry in fact, they planed to sabotage their live interview because their parents JUST DON’T GET IT. Oh, and because they’re both lying cheaters who can’t manage to keep in their pants for more than ten minutes even when their children are visiting. So maybe the angsty kids have it right, they really don’t understand.
Through a series of farce-like events, Karen, the girl one, found her mother and “Uncle Andrew” in a very comprising situation and she blabbed to her father. So Fitz barged into a meeting and punched Andrew in front of many, many people.
Its like Scandal wants us to dislike Fitz. Ok, maybe his completely hypocritical reaction was somewhat explained by his later conversation with Mellie. After Jerry, the boy one’s, birth Mellie completely shut Fitz out and for ten years refused to let him touch her (except when they conceived their other two children, apparently). We know Mellie shut out Fitz because his father raped her and most likely, because this is television, actually fathered Jerry.
Fitz doesn’t know this, but he came close to knowing it. Mellie seemed on the verge of telling him the truth, which would devastate him even more than thinking his wife didn’t want him anymore, until Olivia barged in. Fixing things without even trying or knowing. That takes some skill.
In the end the Grant family found a way to bond in the 20 minutes before their live interview, just in time to charm the pants of American voters. The republic will endure another day.
But the help were having a time of it.
It was revealed Mama Pope and Adnan’s scheme involves getting their hands on the president’s campaign agenda. Adnan got said hands on the agenda by first getting her hands all up on Harrison. Hey Harrison, remember when you were convinced that Adnan coming back to the country would mean very bad things for you? Perhaps you should have rolled with that feeling a little longer.
Meanwhile, Charlie seriously upped his creep factor by moving into Quinn’s apartment without her consent or knowledge to “protect her.” He clearly knows “we argued” is code for “we made out furiously and will continue meeting in dark, scenic locales to make out furiously some more.” B6-13 is very thorough in its training.
But by far the creepiest love story told this week was Jake’s love for his new position. He went from vowing to be a more moral man than Rowan to a power hungry monster pretty fast, right? You’re gonna let a group of terrorists go free to see how it plays out? I can tell you how it’ll play out. Not well.
And finally, I need to end this recap with a complaint. Look, I get that Scandal became known for its grandiose speeches delivered in loud, passionate, staccato tones. And those speeches were awesome, but it’s gotten to the point that these characters can only communicate through monologueing with shaky rage. Overusing the dramatic speeches strips them of their power. Sometimes people, even people under immense stress, communicate through talking. Strange, but true.
But that quibble aside, “Mama Said Knock You Out” was a serviceable place setting episode. Relationships were tested, tensions were raised and now we have three more episodes to see where the rest of the pieces will fall.
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