"All we have to do is listen."
A young lady came to my counter and asked me to size a watch. I took the watch out of the box, placed it on her wrist and asked if she liked to wear her watch tight or loose. She said, “I don’t know if I’m keeping it.” I took the watch off her wrist and said, “Talk to me.”
“My boyfriend bought me this watch and it’s a beautiful watch but it’s rose gold and I specifically asked for a two tone watch because I already have two watches with rose gold as well as a gold one and a silver one and I really wanted a two tone one because I also got some really nice bracelets that would look really good with a two tone watch.”
“So you want a two tone watch?”
“Did you tell him that?”
“And he said this watch is more expensive and it looks really cool and it’s a new style and since it’s new no one else probably has it and he doesn’t understand why I don’t want it if I like the watch.” She stopped and looked at the watch for a second then looked at me with sad eyes and asked, “What do I do?”
“Get a boyfriend that listens,” is what I wanted to say. But that would have been rude. But seriously, get a boyfriend that listens. Any woman who is dating a man that doesn’t listen to her is wasting her time. And any guy who doesn’t listen to his woman is clueless and doesn’t deserve to be dating.
I listen to women. Primarily because I don’t understand them. If you ask me, it’s impossible to understand a woman beyond the basic human characteristics that we share. The thing is I don’t have to understand women. One of the beautiful things about a woman is that she will almost always tell me everything I need to know to make her happy. She will tell me her likes, her dislikes, her wants and her needs. Furthermore, I will be promptly informed when her likes, dislikes, wants and needs change. And then… I will be told all about her new likes, dislikes, wants and needs. It’s a beautiful thing.
All I have to do is listen. All we have to do guys is listen. But we don’t.
I’ve seen guys buy girls roses when she made it clear she loves daisies. I’ve watched women tweet repeatedly about popcorn and then receive candy from her man who follows her. I don’t get it.
But if you allow me to speculate I’d have to go with pride, ego, Machismo, all that random BS that we as guys attach to our manhood. If we just simply deliver that which is asked of us, how does that make us special? I think we choose these moments to insert ourselves so that we can feel better about ourselves. And in the process of reinforcing our manhood, we trample on her happiness.
I was taught by a wiser man than me that it is better to be happy than be right. Why be emotionally attached to something you buy your lady? Why not be emotionally attached to the reaction you receive when she gets something she likes from you? There’s nothing unmanly about getting her exactly what she wants.
If you’re a man be a man whatever being a man means to you. But whatever kind of man you are sometimes…not all the time…but most of the time…shut up. And listen. And just give her what she wants.
Remember. No always. No never.
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