Spring cleaning: taking a "friendventory"

We all have people in our lives who have touched us in some way and then disappeared. I don't mean actually disappeared like passed away or moved really far, but rather, they just sort of fell out of your everyday life and you parted ways. I tend to go through these cycles rather frequently. It's not that I get bored of people fast or piss enough people off that the peace out constantly (at least I hope that's not the reason), I think it's just that I am one to adapt to my surroundings and love the thrill of what's next. While these "floater friends" may have been extremely important to you at one time, it may have been that they came in and out of your life for a reason - to fill a void, so to speak. I know I have had some amazing groups of friends that ultimately seemed like they would be in the nursing home with me one day and then the group pretty much disintegrated a few months later. It's sad to think about, but also inspiring. I think it's pretty cool that as you journey through life to new places, new jobs, new experiences there's always that opportunity to connect with new friends.

For me, I have had the same core girlfriends since kindergarden. We all were born and raised in the same suburbs and other than a few stragglers that went to private school and joined the bunch in high school, we have all been in and out of the same classes from k - 12th grade. Many even grouped together and went off to college together. I cannot fully express how grateful I am for this. Growing up I always wanted to move. I asked my parents probably weekly if we could move somewhere else (this was excellent foreshadowing to my adult life of never being able to sit still). I didn't want to move because I hated my school or my life for that matter, I just get antsy really fast and love the idea of starting over (still do). I will say that looking back I am so glad my family stayed put for all those years. While there have been transitions in the friendships (some live in other states, some are married, some live all the way across the planet) it is so nice to know they will always be there. No matter how many "friend floaters" come in and out of my life, I will always have my core girls who I have inside jokes with from third grade.

So next time you lose touch with a seemingly great friend that you met somewhere along the way of your life, think to yourself, "was there a reason she was here and is now gone?" It could be that the friendship did what it needed to do and you are ready for the next best thing. However, don't let "the lifers" go no matter what. Lifelong friendships are really the most rare and precious things in the world.

Screen shot 2013-03-26 at 6.44.59 PM

College shot of two of my besties (and lifers) Sarah and Mandi 

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Filed under: Life

Tags: friends, friendship, girls

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