What Does it (Really) Mean to Be Your True Self?

You've probably heard the phrase Be Your True Self at some point in life—especially if you're interested in self-help or personal development material.

But what does that really mean—be your True Self.

In The Power of Focused Attention introduction, I suggest you burn your bridges once you cross them. Counter to traditional logic, I encourage you to have nothing to fall back on but instead have something to fall forward on.

"At least that way I can see what I'm going to hit."

~Denzel Washington

Repeat not the past; seek only to create a more satisfying now.

Let's use the analogy of a string of islands connected by bridges to understand what it means to be your True Self.

As you stand on the shores of Island #1, you can see very clearly that island #2 has a more ideal version of your Self.

It's the Self you'd prefer to be; the one you secretly pine for who has the results you want.

Perhaps this version of you has healthy self-confidence, earns an abundant living doing what she loves, or has a loving, trusting relationship with her partner.

Because this is how you'd prefer to be (and are not in this moment) and feels more harmonious with your strong desires and True Self, you cross the bridge.

Island #2 presents you with a challenge, however. It's a challenge you've encountered many times before in life. It doesn't necessarily LOOK the same as past challenges, but you can feel the essense of it IS the same.

This challenge is presenting you with an opportunity to feel and respond differently.

Do you?

Or do you simply react the same way you always do.

Specifically, I'm referring to reacting with fear, doubt, anger, jealously, guilt and negative emotions in general.

If you encounter a challenge that appears to be new, but is essentially the same thing, it's up to you to decide whether you are going to react the same or different.

(By reacting "the same way" I'm referring to negatively. We want to move from reacting negatively to positively .. not the other way around. If you are never challenged with negative reactions from yourself, keep on with what you're doing!!)

For example, let's say you've had a string of not so great relationships. You've essentially been "stuck" on island #1 for most of your life.

A new guy has just shown up. As with the other relationships, it seems great at first. New guy, same screenplay.

You decide this time you're going to find alignment with your True Self. Your True Self knows, without a shadow of a doubt, you have a loving, trusting relationship.

This trusting, loving relationship is only a potential however, and cannot show up, until you have changed internally, first.

Since you're committed to being happier and more secure with Self and you've clearly seen your potential standing on the shores of island #2, you cross and burn the bridge. You're making a bold move and trusting that this time "things" (things meaning you) will be different.

Two months in something happens. You immediately recognize the relationship is going in the same direction the other ones did.

You're now faced with a critical choice.

Do you ... react the same way you always do with angry, disappointment, frustration and sadness?

Or do you align with your True Self and DISCOVER THE GOOD IN THE SITUATION.

When you "find the good" ...  you don't feel bad. You feel good.

You can't BE something without altering what appears in your reality. If you BE happy regardless of how things look, you ARE aligned with your True Self and things ARE different.

Reality will shift but ... do not depend on reality to shift in order to choose how you feel.

That's how you know you'll never try to swim back to island #1.

Once you've changed your beliefs about what's possible for you, you FEEL different even when the situation appears the be same.

If you wait for external situations to change before you alter how you feel, situations can't and won't change.

This is pure physics. 

When you feel good NO MATTER THE SITUATION OR CIRCUMSTANCES, you're aligned with your True Self.

In this moment OF FEELING GOOD, all the potentials you've only dreamed of up until now are condensing into form. If you stay in this place of alignment (alignment feels like hope, ease, and excitement), your True Self blossoms AND you create your ideal situations.

Now ... you're ready for another upgrade of Self. Standing on the shore of Island #2, you see the next best version of your ideal Self on Island #3.

Your True Self is waving at you, smiling.

Do you see the pattern of how to align with your True Self? Do you see what it really means to be your True Self?

Again, once you've stepped onto new soil, burn the bridge.

Island #3 might serve up a challenge with money, your profession or even health.

As with Island #2, on island #3 you will be given the choice to react as you always have or respond with a new outlook of positivity.

In other words, you no longer depend on circumstances to appear a certain way in order for you to be happy, aligned.

Your True Self knows that all the situations and circumstances are presented to you for the soul purpose of giving you a choice to 1) see the good or 2) see the bad.

Your True Self knows that life will always be filled with CONTRAST.


Because in order to know what you DO WANT, it's much easier to first identify what you DON'T WANT.

Contrast is a necessary clarifying agent. It will be found on every island you visit.

Your True Self knows this and does not feel bad when challenges are presented. To the contrary, it gets excited.

Your True Self celebrates the opportunity to move AT ITS OWN PACE. Never any judgement about not going fast enough, doing it wrong or having to repeat a lesson.

Your True Self's mantra is: You never get it wrong; you never get it done.

Think of next level island challenges like this video example ... in the sense that you will move from island to island, challenge to challenge.

Unlike the video example above though you're never "kick out of the game" should you stumble and fall or need a second try.

To summarize, being your True Self means identifying opportunities to shift how you feel internally first so you can feel consistently happier and easier about life. Being your True Self means feeling good ... no matter what.

Your True Self does not look upon the landscape of life with disappointment for things gone wrong. It only sees the ways in which things are ALWAYS WORKING OUT FOR YOU.

We can choose to align with that belief or not. We're so free we can choose bondage.

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