In my thirteen years as a parent, I have seen, heard, and said things I never thought imaginable, as well as faced situations where I was completely clueless. In many instances, there is no way I would have been able to figure things out without the Internet. Good or bad, the Google has saved my ass a number of times.
I was in a reflective mood on Mother’s Day and it got me thinking about all those times I was directionless and on the brink of hopelessness when it came to parenting my kids. I would turn to the Google to take me down a path of knowledge. Don’t get me wrong, sometimes I was led down a path that involved looking at pics of a Kardashian or a royal baby, or purchasing those cute wedge sandles that keep popping up on the right side of my computer screen, but I digress.
Here are Ten Google search terms I have entered when this whole parenting thing was way over my head:
- How do you check your child for ticks
- How do you check your child for lice
- How do you check your child for fleas – can kids even get fleas? Jesus Google… please tell me kids can’t get fleas!
- Google, how do I hold my shit together when my kid has written on everything with a Sharpie?
- Apps for parents to help them understand their middle schooler’s math homework
- Inspirational quotes from Oprah (#WhatWouldOprahDo)
- WTF is Fortnight?
- Is yellow-colored poop normal? Seriously, this can’t be normal can it Google? Is it because my kid swallowed gum? I told her not to do it.
- How do you remove Spider Man stickers without ruining your car’s exterior paint job?
- Hypothetically Google... how much would a boarding school in Connecticut cost?
Some Other Fun Blog Posts To Check Out:
Mother's Day Cards I Think My Kids Might Give Me
10 Things You Will Never Hear Me Say While Shopping At Whole Foods
"Do I really look like this?" - My Magnifying Mirror Experience
Can’t get enough? Here are a couple of my pieces that were published:
Daily Itinerary: Joel Osteen's Hairdresser, Creating Christ-like Coif Perfection, The Belladonna Comedy
Seven Words I Would Have Children S-P-E-L-L If I Were Running The National Spelling Bee, McSweeney’s Internet Tendency