Are You Suffering From Holiday Card Envy?


I am going to be honest with you… I am on the cusp of a mini panic/anxiety attack regarding holiday cards. Don’t get me wrong... I love receiving photo cards from friends and family. I enjoy seeing how much the children have grown and changed, what adventures the family has taken during the year, and to hear or see how the family is doing. It’s like a big warm hug via the US Postal Service.

However, then I put my grumpy judgy Ebenezer Scrooge hat on and get pissy with myself that I didn’t take the time this year to have a professional photo taken of my family riding horses through a forest preserve at sunrise, frolicking on the beach at sunset, or scaling Mount Everest. You know, those incredible family photos where everyone looks like J.Crew models, only better. The lighting is perfect, hair and makeup are flawless, and everyone looks like they like each other.

The best photo I have of my three kids together, actually looking at the camera, was taken at Bengston’s Farm on the Frog Hopper ride. Yes, our 2017 best pic comes from a place where we shoveled kettle corn in our faces and watched pig races.

Now, I know much like Facebook and Instagram, the beautiful family photo card likely portrays a moment of perfection with a sinister backstory. For example, to get little Billy to wear that adorable button down shirt and sweater vest you had to bribe him with $956 worth of Lego sets. Or you have to threaten to throw your teenage daughter’s phone into a meat grinder to get her to stop rolling her eyes in the photo. I get it, what you see on social media and holiday cards is likely not the day-in-day-out reality of the family. However, for that millisecond of time it took to snap that one perfect professional photo, your family looks fabulous, and I am envious.

I am planning on slapping together a holiday card using some photos I took (with my phone) of my darling family for our holiday card. However, these photos will not be Beyoncé-esk with a wind machine, props, and filters.  What our holiday card will give you is a little snapshot of my awesome kids and saint of a husband, not perfectly posed, but perfectly happy.

Note to self:  Plan Beyoncé-esk photo shoot for family in 2018.


Some Other Fun Blog Posts To Check Out:
An Open Letter To The Hormones Raging in My Pre-Teen Daughter
An Open Letter To The Person Standing Behind Me In An Exercise Class
Experiencing A Parental Epiphany In A Foam Pit

Can’t get enough? Of course not.  Here are a couple of my recently published pieces:
Daily Itinerary: Joel Ostend's Hairdresser, Creating Christ-like Coif Perfection, The Belladonna Comedy
Seven Words I Would Have Children S-P-E-L-L If I Were Running The National Spelling Bee, McSweeney’s Internet Tendency

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Filed under: Holidays, Humor, Parenting

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