Posts tagged "toilet paper"

Eight Reasons Halloween Sucks as an Adult

Like Halloween, do you? Think it’s a lot of fun? Yeah, Halloween used to be great, back when it was a perfectly harmless pagan celebration of the occult for children. Now it’s nothing more than a manufactured holiday dreamed up by Big Pumpkin insiders as a way to get our attention outside of catapulting season.... Read more »

Top 5 Things Not to Skimp On in a Recession

Toilet Paper: Butts, most of us only have one. Shouldn't we take care of them? If you've been thinking about cutting corners by cutting plies, think again. It's a matter of basic comfort. And studies have shown that people who regularly use or force others to use single ply toilet paper are 85% more likely to join a terrorist/dog fighting organization. It could happen to you!
In these harsh economic times, we all have to make sacrifices. But there are some areas where we should not cut back, like on the use of the term “in these harsh economic times,” for example. But there are others. Here are five things you should never skimp on … in these harsh economic times.

18 Things Aborigines Might Appreciate

My friend Dickerson's immediate answer  upon being asked what he'd bring them. I particularly enjoy the absurdist/abstract aspect of it this. It's gotta sort of a Duchamp-meets-Motley-Crue- at-a-RedBull-Event quality that is nice as well.
Wouldn’t it be cool to be friends with some tribal aboriginal people somewhere in Australia or Africa or South America? Maybe you have a  friend that is related to aborigines and he took you to visit them and stay a week and they were truly beautiful people who changed your outlook on life, they also... Read more »