Posts in category "Etiquette"

How I Made a Crummy Job Fun For a Moment

How I Made a Crummy Job Fun For a Moment
ChicagoNow is running a weekly special on crummy jobs. Here is my tale. In high school my old man told me I needed to get a summer job to learn the value of a dollar, so I got a job caddying at the local country club. It was a pretty fancy country club with a... Read more »

7 Things You Never Read in Obituaries but Should

<strong>"He was pretty much an A-hole to everyone"</strong><br><br> This would accurately describe like 20 people I know but I'll still never read it in an obituary.
I bet you interact with at least 10 annoying people everyday. They might be outright rude, or just inconsiderate. Maybe they’re painfully bad at their job and it grates on you. It’s possible a nearby service worker always gives you the same trite answer they think is so clever when you ask how they are... Read more »

10 Things Jerks Do

10 Things Jerks Do
After writing this list and leaving this intro until the end, I’ve to come to realize I define a jerk as someone who is selfish, insecure and rude.   1. Jerks share their crap instead of quarantine it If you have a good day, you share your joy with others and hope to spread it... Read more »
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8 Reasons I was Psyched to see Geraldo's Areolae in his Selfie

8 Reasons I was Psyched to see Geraldo's Areolae in his Selfie
I’ve always liked extremely stupid stuff and being psyched about seeing Geraldo’s areolae certainly continues that proud tradition. Don’t get me wrong- I despise things that are stupid. But extremely stupid stuff captivates me like how a tornado enthralls a storm-chaser, it’s destructive and scary but I crave the rush of its nearness. Not the... Read more »

6 More Offenses Justin Bieber Committed in the Blackhawks Locker Room

6 More Offenses Justin Bieber Committed in the Blackhawks Locker Room
Before I’m assailed by Blackhawks fans, I’ll get this out of the way early: You are a bigger Blackhawks fans than I am, and I’m just a bandwagon Chicago import. However, I’m also a levelheaded guy. Recently Justin Bieber came under white-hot scrutiny from Chicago Blackhawks enthusiasts for stepping on the ground. Sure that ground... Read more »

7 Ways Smartphones and the Web F*%k up Your Brain

7 Ways Smartphones and the Web F*%k up Your Brain
1. The Concept of my Attention Span Seems a Distant Memory Having a smartphone and being on Twitter can give you the attention span of a toddler experiencing meth withdrawal. No longer is it good enough to wait indefinitely for an elevator or  sit through a commercial break. Oh, God no.   Instead of suffering... Read more »
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11 More Words You Hear Only When Paired With a Certain Other Word or Prefix

11 More Words You Hear Only When Paired With a Certain Other Word or Prefix
Please note this is the third installment of this series: for further reading: Part 1 and Part 2 can be found here.   Disenfranchise- It’s common to hear a jilted bloc of people referred to as, “disenfranchised”, but I am pretty sure I’ve never heard of anyone being “enfranchised”- which means to set free, or... Read more »

6 Ways to Make Your Job More Like College

6 Ways to Make Your Job More Like College
A few words of advice to the graduating class of 2012 from Dan P, the assistant professor of partying all/some of the time. I’d like to congratulate the class of 2012 and welcome them to the work world. As much fun as college was, you unfortunately cannot make a career out of chugging booze, creeping... Read more »

12 Dos and Don'ts for Office Holiday Parties (Plus Ice Breakers)

So he says, “Those aren’t antlers…” Office holiday parties exist for many reasons. For one, they’re a morale booster. I know whenever I’m handed an asinine project late on a Friday in July, I always think back to the free crostini I received in December and I’m ready to get down to business. They also... Read more »
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Twelve Habits of the Bad Neighbor

A wise man once said, “You take the good, you take the bad, you take them both and there you have, the facts of life.” I think it was George Clooney. He may as well have been talking about neighborhoods, as one of the facts of life is that as much as there are good... Read more »