As all intelligent people know by now, 50 Cent bet a woman on Twitter that if the New York Giants lost the Super Bowl, he'd show his penis on Twitter.
- It's ok to be impressed by my 100% battery life.
We know 50 isn't actually going to show a picture of his hog then go out of his way to prove it's his. So what IS he gonna show?
Since we've established what it won't be, let's try to determine what it will be: odds included.
1. Keenan Cahill. Odds: 25/1
That guy in the display pic with 50 cent. He and 50 are buddies (see below), but if you giggled at the pairing of his picture with the title of this blog, you get why it'd be funny if 50 tried to pass him off as his dangler.
50 comes out at the 1:23 mark. But the stuff before is quality as well.
- Reason Eleventy Billion to question Kanye's fashion sense: If that were a handmade suit the plaid and windowpane would align from his sleeve to the coat's fronts. These clearly don't. Don't brag about bespoke suits if they're machine made. Gots to come correct, Yeezy.
2. Kanye West. Odds: 15/1
Remember when 50's album Curtis was coming out on the same day that Kanye's Graduation came out and 50 told the world that if Kanye outsold him that he would quit rap? Kanye outsold him by a quarter of a million, yet 50 still raps. I'm thinking a picture of Kanye could be his revenge should he suffer another high-profile gambling loss.
3. Someone 50 has had Beef With. Collective odds: 10/1
Oh wait, that doesn't narrow it down much. Off the top of my head I know of Fat Joe, Diddy, Rick Ross, The Game, that bet with Kanye, he insults damn near everyone in this brilliant mix tape that got his foot in the hip-hop door to begin his career, and busts on Bow Wow in Wanksta. Then I just learned he dissed Lil Wayne a bit ago. Not sure why, but I still feel like I'm missing at least 37.....
4. a Porn Star Dong (black). odds: 30/1
I just don't think showing a link to a picture of another dude's baby's arm is consistent with his homophobia. But it would be funny, and that's why I think there's a chance.
5. a Tiny Penis (white). odds: 29/1
See #4, but it'd be funnier.
Plus it'd open the door for 50 to make the, "Yeah, but the black dong is a longer shot, if you know what I mean." argument.
6. Benjamin Franklin. odds: 50/1
Or something money related anyway.
- It's almost like you can't see the photographer's light umbrella thingies reflecting in his glasses.
7. Everything/everyone Else odds: 2/1
I won't insult 50 and assume to be able to predict what his response would be- should it even come to that. I don't feel confident about any of my selections but just wanted to stir up debate. Feel free to leave your selections or different odds in the comments.
And as always kids, for all the latest news on 50 Cent's penis: Keep it here.