Our good friend, Emmett "Rudolpho Sanchez" Nelson, wrote a hilarious and brilliant take on Movember and the art of growing facial hair for Texas State-San Marcos' newspaper, The University Sun. The kind of piece that makes you reevaluate how you have been living your life. Please enjoy and remember to always follow Emmett's advise when growing your beard.
"Move over Movember. No thanks, No Shave November. Keep your five o’clock shadows and your 'it’s so ironic, it’s cool' pencil thin moustache.
Don’t need 'em; don’t want 'em. It takes a special type of man — and in some instances woman — to commit to growing a beard or moustache. It is neither for the weak nor the immature. The mindset it takes to grow facial hair is not reserved for normal people. It is reserved for the true one percent.
It’s not that I have anything against raising money for prostate cancer research. How could I? After all, I do have a prostate. It is the people walking around with their chests puffed out congratulating each other and, as Jordan Gass-Poore reported in a Nov. 17 Unversity Star article, people exclaiming “mines bigger” that I have a problem with. They sound like sexual deviants and my bearded brethren have no desire to be associated with such people. Shave now and just donate some money to the cause.
Beards don’t grow on trees and they certainly don’t grow in a month. It takes at least two months for a proper beard to come in. The mavericks that grow them know and respect this truth. We also know that when you grow a moustache, you grow the whole beard and trim. You are not to pompously grow only a moustache. You look, for lack of a better word, like a pedophile for the first three to four weeks of growth. Spare yourself the indignity and embarrassment. When you commit to growing a beard, you not only commit to the hair, but also the ideals and principals that come with it. You commit to talking about your beard with anyone willing to listen. You become an ambassador for beard wearers all over the world. Make no mistake; you will encounter dissent along the way. Act gentlemanly and invite them into the club. If they decline, we hold no grudges. Men who honor the pursuit of the hirsute commonly are labeled as “hippies”, “trouble makers”, and “non-conformists.” Well, guess what. We are. We didn’t choose what society deemed as normal, but when it is all said and done, we wear our hair proudly. I feel bad for Daniel Gossett, not being allowed to grow a beard because communists run El Paso. Do yourself a favor, Daniel, and learn what it is to truly be free. Don’t let your mother, girlfriend, friends or boss dictate your appearance. Be bold and do something spectacular!
There are few greater pleasures in life than talking to a grey-beard about how long they have been wearing a particular style of facial hair. Some constantly switch their style while never maintaining a clean look. Others I have come to know have had the same style beard or moustache for 30, 40 even 50 years. Movember has nothing on these men. Trust me, you don’t want to look back on life and ask what could have been. Learn from their wisdom and defiantly commit to something."
- Emmett Nelson http://star.txstate.edu/node/5046
Filed under: Mustaches