Archive for April 2014

What if the movie "Say Anything" were made today?

What if the movie "Say Anything" were made today?
In the movie Say Anything Lloyd Dobler (played by John Cusack) decribes his career aspirations like this: I don’t want to sell anything, buy anything, or process anything as a career. I don’t want to sell anything bought or processed, or buy anything sold or processed, or process anything sold, bought, or processed, or repair... Read more »

Happy birthday from the Internet

Happy birthday from the Internet
The homeless man was a nice touch. By that time I had liked a few hundred birthday messages from close friends and near strangers on Facebook. The ATM showed a screen full of balloons and encouraged me to “Take out a little extra and treat myself on my special day!” My barista wrote “Happy birthday!”... Read more »

Quiz: Shakespeare or the Bible? Can you identify these 15 quotes?

Quiz: Shakespeare or the Bible? Can you identify these 15 quotes?
It’s William Shakespeare’s 450th birthday. How well do you know Shakespeare’s work? Can you tell the difference between a quote from Shakespeare and a quote from the Bible? Try my Bard vs. Bible Challenge. Which of the following is a quote from Shakespeare and which is a quote from the Bible? Make your guesses. Answers... Read more »
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To the parents at my daughter's gymnastics class: Why are you there?

To the parents at my daughter’s gymnastics class: Why are you there? Our kids are three. Three! That means we have graduated from parent and tot gymnastics to drop off gymnastics. Drop off gymnastics class, a.k.a. you are expected to drop off your kid and go until class ends. Why are you staying? Be free.... Read more »

Retro Hottie

When I read “Your Co-Workers Found Your Naked Pictures Online” on the Workplace Shenanigans and Other Craziness blog I was reminded of a monologue I wrote a while back. I’m sharing my monologue “Retro Hottie” as today’s Fiction Friday. A woman (mid to late 40s) addresses the audience. She is professionally dressed and attractive if a... Read more »

15 ways to stay awake without drinking coffee

My doctor suggested I stop drinking coffee for a few weeks to see if it has an impact on some as of yet undiagnosed symptons that I’ve been experiencing for years. If this sounds familiar it may be because I wrote a Fiction Friday piece about a woman whose doctor told her to stop drinking coffee.... Read more »
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A mom apologizes to her son for a lame birthday party

Son, come here. I want to apologize for throwing you such a lame birthday party. You deserve better. You are five. A whole hand! You should have a unique and magical party, but I gave you this. I am so ashamed. Look at this Pinterest board I made. I spent months pinning things for your... Read more »

What is the Heartbleed bug, and what should you do about it?

Do you use the Internet? Congratulations, your data has been vulnerable for about 2 years and is even more vulnerable now that the Heartbleed bug has been revealled publicly. Until web sites patch this OpenSSL vulnerability that little lock and https that you’ve been taught will keep your data safe as it travels across the... Read more »

The Easter Bunny and the Blair Witch

I am a fan of cheap holiday decorations and party supplies from Oriental Trading Company. I flip through the Oriental Trading catalogs even when I’m not planning a party. Part of why I like to browse Oriental Trading is that some of the stuff is bizarre (at least to me). For example, I thought the... Read more »
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Suspicious activity in the workplace

“It’s suspicious, right?” “I guess.” “You don’t think so?” “It’s definitely weird.” “Suspicious.” “What’s suspicious is that you’ve been watching this woman all day. People always say to me, they say, ‘So do you guys just sit around and spy on us with those cameras all day?’ I always say, ‘No. We’re looking at everything... Read more »