List 24: What I really wanted for Christmas

List 24: What I really wanted for Christmas
None of those were for me.

I got some nice things for Christmas, but Christmas for me is more about seeing my kids excited than what I might get. It's not that I don't like things. I really like things, but I have plenty of things already. There are some things I really want, but they would be difficult to impossible to give as gifts. Still, since I do have a birthday coming up in about 16 weeks I'll make my wish list known in case anyone can manage to make even one or two of these things happen.

Stuff I want, in no apparent order:

  • For all the bathrooms in my house to be self-cleaning.
  • Same for the kitchen.
  • Actually, just make the entire house self-cleaning. Thanks in advance.
  • To have my 35 year old body back. (Seriously, I was in better shape than I was in my twenties.)
  • A coffee tap that allows me to get a cup of coffee as easily as filling a glass of water.
  • A margarita tap would also be nice.
  • The ability to subscribe to HBO without having to subscribe to cable TV.
  • Daily massages.
  • Monthly pedicures.
  • For my kids to consistently sleep through the night without "co-sleeping."
  • For my kids to sleep past 7 a.m. particularly on weekends and holidays.
  • Money and time for a beach vacation...
  • ...ideally without the kids.
  • More people clicking the Facebook like button on my blog posts (like this one) or liking my Facebook page. Those things shouldn't matter, but as A City Mom points out, they do.
  • A personal assistant in charge of paper: filing it or shredding it or making me do something with it before its deadline.
  • A personal assistant in charge of email: like paper only there's more of it.
  • A babysitter who has no life or other jobs and is, therefore, constantly available when I need her even on short notice.
  • The time and energy to read books.
  • The time and energy to write plays.
  • An Addams Family pinball game, and
  • A pinball maintenance and repair person. (I just want to play pinball in my house whenever I want. I don't want another chore.)
  • Electronics that don't become obsolete for at least 5 years, ideally 10.
  • A walk in closet.
  • The natural blond hair color of my youth.
  • Hair that air dries looking like a perfect blow out.
  • Or an imperfect blow out. Just something that looks like a hair style.
  • To have the batteries replaced in my watches. (I have at least 5 watches, but only one is currently working.)
  • To have the hems repaired on my pants and skirts. (Most of my work clothes are currently unwearable.)
  • To have the heels repaired on the majority of my boots and work shoes. (Between this and the item above it's amazing that I can still create a reasonably well-kempt look for work. Luckily, I'm off until January.)
  • Speaking of work, I would like to be in an office instead of a cube...
  • Or at least to be in a cube that is not adjacent to a high traffic water cooler and printer...
  • Or at least not to feel singledby being the only person in my department with a cube instead of an office...
  • Or at least to be above caring about my work environment or job satisfaction or feeling valued.
  • To have someone else undecorate the Christmas tree and pack the ornaments. Oh, how I doing hate that.
  • Dinner at Alinea (paid for including cab and babysitter).
  • To achieve anything on my list of unattainable goals.

But more important than any of those I want

  • My children to be safe and healthy.
  • People to stop shooting each other.
  • An end to cancer.
  • The entire assortment of "Real Housewives" shows to go off the air.

I also accept gift certificates.

If you enjoyed this (and didn't catch the subtle hint above) please click the Facebook "like" button above or below this post. You can also join me on Facebook here or follow me on Twitter here.

Filed under: Christmas, Lists

Tags: Christmas, Gifts, Lists, Personal

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    Kim Z Dale

    I'm a McSweeney's girl in a Buzzfeed world. I'm a playwright with a master's degree in information security. I have two kids and too many ideas. I'm a Big Apple born Steel Town girl living in the Windy City and loving it. Contact me at kimZdale [at] gmail [dot] com.

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