Licensed to kill time

This is part of my Fiction Friday series.

Clocks killing time

I kill time. I kill time all the time. I am a serial killer of time.

I strangle it with stupidity.

I butcher it with bitchiness.

I slaughter it with silliness.

I vanquish it with vapidness.

I clobber it with clicks.

I torture it with trolls.

I murder it with memes.

I smite it with smileys.

I eviscerate it with videos.

I bash it with baby pictures.

I bludgeon it with blog posts.

I suffocate it with selfies.

I hammer it with hoaxes.

I quash it with quizzes.

I immolate it with emoji.

I gag it with games.

I torment it with trivia.

I needle it with news.

I maul it with email.

I poison it with private messages.

I sting it with statuses.

I assassinate time with the astute and the asinine. Either works.

I am the Internet, licensed to kill time.

You still dare to question my time killing power? Behold! Here are 13 pictures of cats for no apparent reason!

*     *     *     *     *

Have more time to kill? Read other Fiction Friday posts here, including

Get notified of new posts by email. Type your email address in the box and click the "create subscription" button. My list is completely spam free, and you can opt out at any time.

You can also find Kim Z. Dale on Twitter and Google+ and like Listing Toward Forty on Facebook.

Leave a comment