You're just a stay-at-home-Mom?

You're just a stay-at-home-Mom?
Stay at home WHAT?! (1980)

Loved ones easily take stay-at-home Moms for granted. You may often hear snide and smug condescending remarks toward stay-at-home Moms. “Lucky for them – how nice.”

The thankless job of a stay-at-home-Mom

Thankless job of a stay-at-home-Mom

Maybe they’re jealous. Maybe they’re resentful. Most people fail to recognize that parents make choices.

It’s admirable for parental units to choose for one parent to stay home. My parents sacrificed to make that choice. My Dad worked for years as a Chicago Police Officer while he got his law degree at night. He made even less as a public defender.

Although my mother achieves everything she sets her mind to, she chose to stay home with her three kids. That wasn’t because my parents had extra money. They sacrificed. My well educated and beautiful Mom didn’t have a nanny or housekeeper.

My Mom never complained. She didn’t let on how hard it was. Many of my grade school friends’ parents both worked outside the home.

My Mom was our community’s solid rock. When my friends were sick, my Mom often picked them up from school and nursed them. My Mom didn’t stop working when my Dad got home or on the weekends.

My Mom worked and still does around the clock. I don’t remember ever thanking her. Sadly, I didn’t appreciate her hard work until I was a parent.

In addition to my Dad’s career (day job), he served the army in the reserves. That means my Mom usually cared for three+ kids during normal business hours, in the evenings when my Dad had a meeting and often on weekends. There were no fancy business lunches for her. Although my Dad will retire from his career (also a wonderful father), my Mom will never retire from hers.

Although my career is one of my passions, I am not indispensable. I like to think I am, but my employer survived during both of my maternity leaves. Business would continue if I gave my notice at work.

My childhood was rich with learning opportunities thanks to my Mom. If she put in her two weeks’ notice as some employers do, life would’ve ended as I knew it. There would’ve been no one to tutor me, drive me to swimming, piano, acting and every other activity I did.

Life in my family with our stay-at-home Mom meant a house that always smelled like the best homemade cookies and meals. We spent hours laughing before my Dad got home from work. Our friends were always welcome.

Although my Dad also enriches our lives in infinite ways, he’s the first to say their partnership is not 50/50. He credits my Mom with 100+% of the joy and sacrifice that is their family unit.

So, get it straight. There’s no such as just a stay-at-home Mom!

This post is part of the Social Butterfly Mom's series "Validate Thy Neighbor" #validatethyneighbor, in which two bloggers choose a topic and write in support of the OPPOSITE of what they practice. Today, Ups and Downs of a Yoga Mom, stay-at-home-Mom, and I, a work-outside-the-home-Mom, explore the potential roles of our counter-parts. Please contact the Social Butterfly Mom if you are a blogger and would like to participate: thesocialbutterflymom@gmail.com.

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Filed under: family, wellness

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