I've been dreaming of being a hero in a dark world

My subconscious has been incredibly active lately. It’s also been incredibly dark.

I’ve awoken or been disturbed in my sleep by scenes of violence or suspense.

I don’t know what this means about my psychological or spiritual state. It probably isn’t good.

FOT6D75Here’s the interesting thing: I’ve been in positions of strength in the dreams--at times a hero.

Last night, I took up a crusade against a librarian who was forcing children taking classes at the library to do unpaid physical labor. (This may have been the oddest of the dreams.)

A couple of weeks ago, I ventured through a post-apocalyptic shopping mall to fight the only living person there. (I woke to him waking in the back seat when I thought he was dead, but nonetheless.)

A month ago, I hunted a killer.

This is certainly a mental shift for me. I feel that my dreams once-upon-a-time had me feeling powerless at worst and an observer at best. (They were also perhaps more realistic, and certainly cheerier.)

My daytime consciousness leaves me feeling much like those once-upon-a-time dreams. There is so much going on in the world, so much information, and so little I feel that I can do. But at the same time, I feel, more than ever before, that I am looking for actions to take, looking for ways to engage, and having conversations about civics and patriotism and equality daily.

The fight is alive in me, while I may not feel the strength.

The fight is good. Like so many have written far better than I: the things that make America so great are rising to the top.

At least the strength is coming through in my dreams. The dark tones… perhaps it’s the mood of the day or my fears percolating--or perhaps it’s that I’ve been binging on crime shows and murder mysteries and Rectify. That could well be it.

That dream about the librarian and child labor though. That was strange.

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