A massive, bearded, red and black "hell yeah" of congratulations to the Chicago Blackhawks - Stanley Cup Champions after 49 long years! And to all of the fans over the decades, enjoy this moment you deserve it!!
But I think there may be someone else who deserves it even more. I will give you one guess. Her name started with "O" and rhymes with "Opah!" That's right Oprah deserves the Stanley Cup.
At least her BF Stedman Graham probably thinks so.
This week Graham said that Chicagoans don't really appreciate all that is the "OPRAH." "I really don't think they appreciate her. I don't think they understand the value of who she is as a human being and what she's done," said Graham.
That got me to thinking, have we, as Chicagoans, really showed the "O" our full appreciation? I mean, does closing down Michigan Avenue for her show and rerouting buses at taxpayers expense last year really count for anything. If you think about it, it's just a token, merely a trifle.
But what do you give the woman who has upwards of a $2.4 billion net worth as a result of the support of her Chicago fans here? You can't just send her a "thank you" card. Dinner at Harry Caray's (that's about the limit for me) doesn't cut it and it's not like you can facebook her. Paved gold street blocks, ticker tape parades...what would be enough? I mean, thanking Oprah is tough. So, Stedman has a point, what can we get Oprah?
The Sted-man went on to say, "I'm just saying from an insider's point of view that I don't think she gets her just due based on who she really is and what she's done for the Chicagoland area. It's home for her, and it's just natural for people to kind of take her for granted--until you leave."
See, that is why this is so tough. I just don't know what to get her to show my personal appreciation. And then there is the rest of Chicago. How do we truly show this Queen, Her Majesty, the Oprah, how we feel? That's how I came up with idea of giving Oprah the Stanley Cup.
Here is the cost-benefit analysis of giving Oprah the Stanley Cup. On the positive side....
1. It's big.
2. It's silver.
3. It's shiny.
4. It's big enough to hold alot of cool stuff.
5. It has a boatload of meaning to the Chicago Blackhawks, Rocky Wirtz, Patrick Kane, Chicagoans and hockeyfans worldwide. I mean, the Blackhawks haven't won the Stanley Cup since 1961!
6. After losing the Olympics to Brazil, the Stanley Cup win kind of makes it up to the city. (Don't you think? Today, I can walk around today with my head held high - that we are from Chicago!)
What better way to show Oprah our appreciation, right?
But here's the negative side of the cost-benefit analysis...
1. It's the Stanley Cup.
2. It's the Stanley Cup!
3. It's the (expletive deleted) Stanley Cup!!!!
So, Chicago, it's time to vote. What will it be? Oprah or the Stanley Cup? Choose...
William J. Kelly is a political satirist and commentator. He also pens the very popular Bill Kelly Truth Squad for the Washington Times. He the executive producer of an Emmy award-winning TV production house and a graduate of the Second City Conservatory.