I have it on good authority that this is what transpired when Mitt Romney called President Obama last night to concede:
Sound of a "Hail to the Chief" ringtone in the Presidential suite at the Fairmont Hotel, Chicago.
President looks at his iPhone, sees who's calling.
President: Quiet down in here! Malia, turn down the tv. What are you watching anyway...
President nswering the phone: Yeah, hold on, hold on a second.
Malia: It's MTV Jams, Jeezy's new song.
President: Malia, just turn it down for a second, it's Romney.
Mitt Romney: Mr. President, this is Gov. Romney.
President: Hold on a second. Damn...Michelle? Will you get Malia to turn down the tv, I've got Romney on the phone. And, is it too much to ask to get some cell phone service in here for God's sake. AT&T sucks.
Romney: Mr. President?
President: I'm here, I'm here. What's up?
Romney: Mr. President, I want to say that you've run a splendid campaign and that I am disappointed by the outcome, but ...
President: Hold on, hold up a second...Michelle!!! Where is the lint brush? I can't find anything in this suite. And, have you seen my keys?
Yes, Governor, sorry, you were saying?
Romney: Mr. President, I was saying that it is clear now that you will win this election and I am formally ...
President: Hold on, hold on Governor ... Who ordered anchovies on the Gino's East pizza? Is that some kind of joke that you're playing on me tonight? It's Gino's East - where's the sausage? Why can't I ever get the kind of pizza that I want?
Go ahead Governor.
Romney: Yes, Mr. President, I am calling to inform you of my concession and to wish you all the best over the next four years and anything that I can ...
President: One second Governor, hold up, hold on...Who turned off the Bulls game? Craig! Where's Craig? Michelle - where did your brother go? Did he take the remote? What happened to the Bulls game?
Sasha: The Bulls won Dad. Smh.
President: Ok, cool. Yes Governor, thank you. I am sure that we can collaborate and discuss what is best for this country.
Romney: And, I just want to let you and Michelle know that from Ann and I, this has been an incredible experience that we have enjoyed and will cherish for quite some time and we wish you and your ...
President: OK Governor, thank you. Bye bye now.
All right ... Michelle, Sasha, Malia, let's bounce!!!
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