Toronto Mayor Rob Ford has "more than enough to eat at home"

Chicago has a rich political history. The city's mayoral history is especially rich when it comes to the use of the English language. First there was Mayor Big Bill Thompson, who gave Webster's the definition of buffoon. He also continually threatened to punch the King of England in the nose.

Then we had Mayor Richard J. Daley, Mayor Malaprop the I. He was known for such aphorisms as:

"The police are not here to create disorder, they are here to preserve disorder."

"We are proud to have with us the poet lariat of Chicago."

"We have to face it: in America today the way to have fun and celebrate is to break a store window and take something. That's the way it is, today in America, and we have to accept it."

"We shall reach greater and greater platitudes of achievement."

Then along came Harold Washington. Our Harold brought great vocabulary to City Hall. Words like vile and scurrilous. He added the phrase a"antediluvian dodo birds" to Chicago's lexicon.

Along came Richard M. Daley, Mayor Malaprop II. He was famous for his repition, "Trees, trees, trees". There was his recent deposition where he claimed not to know what he knew when he did not know it.

Then there were these chestnuts:

“I worked for him. I raised money for him. What am I supposed to do, take my pants off?”

“I thought the health of people is very important. If a rat is on your sandwich, you hope to know it before. If a mouse is on your salad, it’s common sense.”

“Scrutiny? What else do you want? Do you want to take my shorts? Give me a break. How much scrutiny do you want to have? Go scrutinize yourself! I get scrutined (sic) every day, don’t worry, from each and every one of you. It doesn’t bother me.”

"Everyone's for corruption, both in the private and public section."

"There are no excuses for children to learn." (Quotes are from ABC Chicago and the Chicago Tribune)

Along comes Rahm Emanuel, who has never been shy about telling people what he thinks or what they can go do themselves. He is most known for !@#$%^&*()_+. Yep the whole upper case of the keypad.

But, Chicago, you should be proud of your mayors, buffoons, Malaprops, elocutionists, and nine fingered swearers.

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Chicago Tribune photo

Folks, nothing compares to Rob Ford, the mayor of Toronto. He is a mook, poltroon, mamaluke, buffoon, and macaroon all rolled up in to one rotund roly-poly jolly fellow.

Second City and the Onion put together could not create Rob Ford.

In case you have not been following Mayor Ford's trials and travails, he was allegedly caught on video tape smoking crack. The Toronto police are investigating.

The voluble Ford at first denied the charge, then he claimed he may have smoked crack while on a drunken toot.

Things only got worse when he was accused of sexual improprieties and harassment and driving under the influence of alcohol.

Calls for his resignation have gone unheeded.

Not content to lie low until the scandal blows over, he keeps talking and talking, and talking, like that annoying pink battery bunny. Then, as this video shows, he really goes over the top about allegations of demanding oral sex. He not only graphically denies the allegations, he explicitly states he is "happily married and I've got more than more than enough to eat at home".

Warning, the video is NSFW or the kiddies.

Later he apologized with his wife standing by his side. He whined, begged, and pleaded to be left alone.

 

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