A month or so ago I wrote a post about a guy asking me out on the bus a year prior. Then a month later, I wrote about doing stand-up on a show, looking into the audience, and seeing him in the front row. That was definitely unexpected, but what if I told you that I saw him again last weekend? Well, here it goes. I'm going to tell you: I saw him again last weekend.
How shocked are you? I'm assuming your device that you're reading this on is broken now from the milk you spit out on it.
My friend and I decided that we were going to go out on Saturday. Like, actually out. We were going to get dressed up, go to some sort of a bar, and get our flirt on. We didn't have specific plans, so we just decided to meet up with some friends to see what their plans were. We all ended up at the wonderful bar, Holiday Club.
There, we sat and chatted until I saw a figure walk through the door. I only caught his face for a second before he went back outside, but I thought he looked familiar. "Wouldn't it be funny if that was bus guy?" I thought. I shook off the idea. Then, 5 seconds later, he was back inside, and it was definitely bus guy.
I audibly gasped and sunk deep into my chair, where I stayed for a couple minutes. I'd always been told, "It's definitely not suspicious when you make a loud noise and then sink into your chair at a cool bar." It worked, though. He walked right past me with some girl who was definitely not the girl he was with at my stand-up show.
I went around to each of my friends, telling them the year-long saga between me and bus guy. I went to the bar with like 15 of my friends, so this process took a while. If you're one of the friends who I told this story to, sorry I probably repeated it at least 3 times, and sorry I'm making you read this as well.
"Maybe he's stalking me", I thought. But then I realized that he'd be doing a shitty job at it if he only ran into me 3 times in 1 year...Or does that mean he's just that good at it that I only noticed 3 times? I will keep you updated.
We passed each other several times over the next couple of hours, and neither of us acknowledged each other. To be fair, I had recently transformed into "Hot Lindsay" with a new wardrobe and hair cut, so it's entirely possible he didn't recognize me without my schlubby exterior. But maybe he did recognize me and was trying to play it cool. I later saw him attacking his date's face in the middle of the bar.
He wasn't like hitting her or anything, but they were aggressively making out, which has always made me very uncomfortable. I don't know about you, but I'm more afraid of PDA than of dying alone, and I'm pretty afraid of dying alone.
The rest of the night was pretty uneventful. I don't drink, so I unfortunately remember the whole night. But I'm probably the only one of my friends who does. As they've been asking me, "You were there on Saturday!?"
So I guess I have to tell them this story again. Or I'll at least send them the link to this post.
Maybe Bus Guy has a girlfriend now, but I did stand-up in front of Mike Tyson, so who's really winning? Obviously me.
Sorry, I have to go. I've got an important date with my Tinder App.