Don't Drive Through Colorado

Now that I’ve had time to recover and regroup from my cross-country drive, it's time for a rating of each state on AAA’s Northern Route scenic tour.

The dogs and I started off in the west with the intentions of going east in a whirlwind of let’s see this country bravado.  (In truth, I had no idea what they dogs were thinking and probably projected the thoughts onto them.)

The first couple of hundred miles in my escape from California were fine with lots of Starbucks, purple mountain majesties and fruited plains along the way.

Lo and behold, it turns out that Barstow, California of all places has the most wonderful Best Western Hotel.  Never mind that it is next to a highway and a rail yard without a major mall of a Nordstrom’s Rack in sight, they still managed to procure 500-count thread sheets and soft feather pillows in their rooms and freshly squeezed orange juice at breakfast.  I felt like staying some extra nights, or maybe even a year, but it was time to move on because of the reservations at other places.

Next, it was the Best Western Pony Inn in Flagstaff, Arizona on Route 66.  You will recognize this place by the stupid looking plastic pony in front. There is a Chinese restaurant across the street but I would avoid that place, too unless you want to get a hole burned in your mouth by some hot Chinese red peppers and cooks who don’t understand the meaning of the word “mild.”  Though I must say that they must be in pretty good with the state because they are an equal opportunity employer because it is the first Chinese restaurant I’ve been to with a white waiter, and I left him a nice tip in spite of the fact that my mouth was on fire.

See what I mean?


The breakfast buffet at the Pony Inn was dumb, too because it had some pretty runny food.  Avoid that hotel but if you’re feeling brave, go to the Chinese restaurant across the street, but be sure to bring a flashlight and some pepper spray if it’s after dark because that lot is darker than inside a cave.

Another place to avoid, now that I am on a roll, is Colorado mainly because their drivers are about as intelligent as that horse on the lawn.  And I will never go there again, even if I get invited to Sundance, maybe. Someone on my Facebook page who is possessed enough to live there, posted something on my page about picking the best logo for the state.  But it only had drawings of mountains at different angles, so I didn’t vote because I was looking for a truck rammed into a concrete wall.

This is not without due cause because one driver began tailgating on a freeway entrance and then maneuvered in front of me and slammed
on the brakes before driving off.

I thought I was about the only one, but when I got to the hotel the receptionist said that it’s normal for out there and that it happened to her three times in one day.  If they put me on the logo committee, I will submit my idea for the correct brick wall logo, which I am sure many drivers would agree with.

I won’t even get into the Best Western there and how they charged me for each dog per night, a pox on their hotelier souls even with a normal hot breakfast and all those choices of tea.

Well, dear reader(s), that’s about all for now.  Next time, I’m going to write about some other states, too, especially about how I got a warning in Nebraska when my tires went over a white line for a nanosecond.  For now, I need to drink some chamomile tea.



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