Posts in category "fear"

Dear Dad at the Park Calling Your Son Chicken for Not Wanting to Slide

I can’t get you out of my head.  Rather, I can’t get your boy out of my head. After I heard you say it for the third time, “WHAT ARE YOU CHICKEN?” as your boy was at the top of the slide taking in his options, my blood was boiling. It crushed my heart to... Read more »

What it feels like to be an Alcoholic

At first it takes away all your fear.  That drink just warms you all over and suddenly you have confidence and you are the girl you always wanted to be.  All your qualms about being with other people, with men, just vanish. Melt away.  You think you’ve found your golden ticket.  The answer to all... Read more »

How one hour completely turns my life around to gratitude

What can happen in one hour that is so completely transformative, so entirely life changing, so utterly unbelievable? I walk into a room with other like minded individuals.  We don’t all agree on everything, hell on most things, but on this one thing, we agree we need each other. I walk into a room of... Read more »
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The Butterfly the Finch and the Dragonfly

Walking from our home to the train, there is a finch on the sidewalk. Decomposing. Deteriorating. Quiet. Walking across the river into the Tower for work, across a long courtyard full of flower boxes and lush, expensive landscaping along the Chicago River, rests a tranquil little minute of an oasis amid the sky rises and... Read more »

I Saw This Family at the Dollar Store

When you troll the dollar stores for years in search of paper plates and straws and cat toys and party favors and completely inedible foods, you never even walk down the toy aisle. Except when you are looking for your nephews and then you think LET’S JUST KEEP LIKING LIGHT UP STICKS FOREVER, can we... Read more »

Donna Day 2015: Baby You're a Firework

Today is Donna Day.  This year is the 4th year I’ve written about sweet Donna and her mama.  My previous posts are here and here.  I really loved those posts.  I love them as much today as I did when I wrote them. But it feels like we keep repeating ourselves.  Let’s work to stop that. The first... Read more »
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Reeks of Compassion

You never know who you will find inside the disguise.  The protection.  The armor. Just look in her eyes.  Just smell his breath.  Just try to imagine combing her course twisted hair.  Just think what his skin looks like underneath that layer of grime.  He can’t remember the last time he went to the dentist... Read more »

All the Things I Would Miss

Being sober for a while, it gets a bit easier to rest on your laurels.  To think that you’ve got this thing licked and that you are just like everybody else. Normal.  Wife, mother, employee, friend, daughter, sister, aunt, neighbor. The thing is though, that can all disappear with just one drink.  While that seems... Read more »

Sunday Night Blues

I don’t mind Mondays.  It’s not that.  I quite like Mondays.  For I am a seeker of order and schedules and organization.  Once Monday arrives, I am usually quite content to greet the day and get back to work. However, the Sundays that come before the Mondays.  They are the pits. The Sunday Night Blues.... Read more »
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What happened when I stopped asking for permission

Maybe it was being all jacked up on hormones.  Maybe it was the devil science.  Maybe it was that my desire to start a family was so much stronger than what my priorities had been prior to that period of time.  I’m not sure what it was exactly, but there was a point in time... Read more »
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    Katy

    I'm a grateful drunk who doesn't drink (sobriety date 10/4/2001), a smoker who doesn't smoke and a mom of boy/girl twins from IVF born 1/7/13. I'm grateful for the good the bad and the ugly. It's great to be alive!

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