What did you do with your life when Facebook went down?

What did you do with your life when Facebook went down?

It was Monday. Noon. Two days ago but it seems much longer.

I had just finished a new blog post. It was time to share it on my social media sites...and as long as I was there, I might as well hang out on the sites. Time to see what was going on in the world. Because when you need to information on how to lead your life, where else would you go? Time to hit Facebook.

First step was hitting the blue share icon you see at the top. Hmmm...nothing. What did I do wrong? It can't be them. It has to be me, right? I tried again. I see this message:

Sorry, something went wrong.
We're working on it and we'll get it fixed as soon as we can.
Go Back!

NOOOOOOOOOO!!!!

How is this possible? How can this happen? These are the techie-est people in the world. Facebook can't be down. I still wasn't convinced. I tried to log into my Facebook account on my computer. Same message. I tried on my phone. Same message. I guess my phone really wasn't that smart.

I finally came to the correct conclusion. Facebook was broken. For once in my life, it wasn't me...IT WAS THEM!

After a few minutes of stress, I realized I wasn't going to be hanging out with the Facebook peeps. This had never happened before. What if Facebook never comes back? I've never had to deal with this. I had to find something else to do...but what? How am I going to be able to make this decision?

I looked at the clock. It's still around noon. While I thought it was a lifetime, only a few minutes had passed. Maybe I can have some food? I kind of remember this thing called lunch. I kind of remember it's a meal people eat in the middle of the day. It's what we did before Facebook.

I made a sandwich and ate it fast. I didn't want to waste any time. It was off to see if Facebook was back. I tried signing in again.

SAME MESSAGE!!!!

NOOOOOOOO!

What's next?

Rumor has it there's this thing called the outdoors. To get there, you have to put on clothes, open a couple of doors and keep putting one foot after the other. Yanno...walking. I wonder what that's like? Hmmmm...maybe I should try that. It can't hurt, can it? It can't be that bad, can it?

I gave it a try. Hey look, it's a big orange thing in the sky. Is that Trump? Ahhh...it's the Sun. I remember the Sun. Hmmm....is this what they call fresh air? It feels pretty good. I think I'll keep going.

I took a walk around the neighborhood. Look at all these stores. There's a bank. There's a grocery store. Hey, there's a Walgreens...and another one...and another one. Hmmm...there are three Starbucks, too. What have I been missing all this time? Oh my, there are people outside, too. What are they doing here? Don't they know about social media? Don't they know Facebook is broken?

After about an hour, I had enough. It was time to go home.

First thing I did was check my phone. Hmmmm...Facebook works on here. Maybe it's back. Please don't tease me, Zuckerberg. I had to see if it was true. I turned on my laptop. I hit the Facebook icon. There it was. It wasn't a tease.

FACEBOOK IS BACK!!!

PHEW! I could share my blog post. I could find out what was happening in the world. I could see my friends...both real and imagined. Life as we know it was back. PHEW!

All of this was stressful. I took a nap.

It's been two days since all of this. It really does seem longer. Facebook hasn't had any issues since...at least none that we know of. I've been able to do whatever I did before "the episode." But yanno....that outside thing kind of intrigues me. I wonder what it would be like to try it again. Maybe if Facebook goes down again, I'll give it another try. Do you think that could happen? Is that possible?

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!

 

Related Post: Using Facebook for good instead of evil

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Filed under: humor, Satire

Tags: Facebook

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