The obsessive hunt for a new computer

The obsessive hunt for a new computer

This is a Best Buy in Bucktown. I've been 'living' here for the last four months.

Okay, I'm not really living here, although it wouldn't be so bad. They have tons of entertainment options. Huge televisions, a large audio room, clean bathrooms and snacks. Plus, dozens of computers to get you hooked up to the internet.

Oh yeah, computers...the reason I'm spending so much time at Best Buy.

It started back in April. I saw this Surface Laptop thing on a commercial during an NBA playoff game. The commercial was cute and so was the laptop. My current one is getting old and slowing down. This one looked like it could do everything I wanted so I figured why not check it out. Off to Best Buy for the first of what has to be a hundred times since then. If you don't believe that, I have someone who can vouch for it. Really!

The laptop looked fine but I couldn't make a decision. Yes! No! Maybe! I don't know! Do I really need a new one? OY!

So I had to keep going back...and not just to the one in Bucktown. Three others in the city plus I took this obsessive, ridiculous hunt to the burbs.

Skokie, Glenview, Vernon Hills, Evanston!!! OY!

Some people think I was just doing research. Making sure I was getting the right product for my needs. I know better. I get this way about a lot of things. When I see something I like, I get obsessive.

Example #1: Years ago, I found out that a guy I went to school with owns a bakery. They make this Cherry Vanilla Challah. Sounds pretty great, doesn't it? What's not to like? Cherry, yum! Vanilla, yum! Challah, yum! Put them all together and that's one hell of a loaf of bread. The problem is the bakery is somewhere in Virginia.

That didn't stop me. I started calling all the bakeries on the north side of Chicago. Nothing, nada, zip! Off to the burbs...Skokie, Evanston, Highland Park, Glenview...nothing, nada, zip! After two months of conducting this search for the elusive challah, I gave up. Still...TWO MONTHS!!!

Example #2: Last week I saw some people on Twitter talking about flavored Tootsie Rolls. You've probably seen them...vanilla, cherry, lime, orange. They're yummy. I decided I needed some....immediately. I went to Jewel, Mariano's, Walmart, Walgreens, CVS and a few more places. Couldn't find them but the search went on for a few days.

Okay...so you see that if I'm going to that extreme for challah and tootsie rolls, you know I'm going to be crazed over buying a computer....and I was...am!

So after being nuts about this Surface Laptop for a month, I decided to increase my search. I thought why not a Mac. After a month of asking questions of Mac owners and going to Best Buy's to play with them, I made my choice. I'm buying a Mac AirBook. I'm all jazzed about my decision and it's off to Best Buy...again.

THEY ARE CLOSED!!!

NOOOOOOO!!!!! I got there ten minutes too late. And me being me....I took it as a sign. The search was back on.

It's two months later and still no new laptop. Last weekend, I again walked into Best Buy. They now know me by name and laugh when they see me in the computer department. This time I see a different computer. Just what I need. Another contender to add to my indecisiveness. OY!

The Laptop is a HP model. Same size and specs as the first two but a little faster, a little cheaper. I went back a second time to look, but the price went up and I walked out without buying it....AGAIN!!

Sooooooo....it's Sunday afternoon. I'm chilling at home and decide to check out Amazon. Hmmm....maybe they have this new machine for sale. YES! THEY! DOOOOO!!!

Not only do they have it but it's cheaper, there's no sales tax plus I have a couple hundies in my Amazon account. I pull the trigger!! After four months....one third of an entire year...I finally buy a new computer. Phew!

The next day, I get an email from Amazon. The computer is shipped and it'll be here Wednesday. It also has a recap of the order. I click on it. Hmmm...this isn't what I ordered, is it? I wanted the smaller screen. I wanted the one that was lighter.

I BOUGHT THE WRONG FUCKING COMPUTER!!

Soooooo....Monday morning it was back to Best Buy. I wanted to see I could live with my mistake. Yeah, it's bigger but it might be doable. Yeah, it's heavier but it might be doable. Keyword: might. I just don't know but we may be back to square one.

OY!!!!!

I'll either figure it out....or I won't. Honestly, I wouldn't be surprised if I'm still screwing around with this by Christmas. Hmmm....I'll bet Best Buy has some great deals coming up on Black Friday!

In the meantime, does anyone know where I can get a cherry vanilla challah or some fruit flavored Tootsie Rolls?

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Filed under: humor, Satire

Tags: Amazon, Best Buy, HP, Mac, Microsoft

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