Category: Grief

Hey Nationwide, I'm not on your side

So, say you’re at a party. Eating snacks. Socializing. Probaby drinking. Just kicking back, enjoying America’s Great Holy Day Super Bowl Sunday like, “heck yeah, Imma have some guac here and wait for Katy Perry to come on,” and all of a sudden someone just punches you in the heart. Like, you have no breath... Read more »

Weaning the baby: The luck of letting go

I didn’t nurse the baby last night, or this morning either. There’s that slight ache. For two minutes yesterday she did want to nurse to calm down after being clunked in the head when her sisters wrestled her into a “baby sandwich” an inch too close to the coffee table. Soon she was bored with... Read more »

A ghost story of . . . faith?

It’s no surprise to me that Halloween is edging up as an important holiday with Christmas and Easter. After all, aren’t the latter two full of spirits and ghosts? Tell yourself this is fiction if you need to. I’m being haunted. When my mother-in-law went under the care of hospice in her home, I didn’t... Read more »

I got told by a soccer dad

Today was the first day of soccer and if you’d like to save yourself the next 10 paragraphs, it ended in me getting yelled at. There are twelve games being played simultaneously on one, huge, monotonous field like some kind of Spartan training ground. Seriously, there are no landmarks and a sea of identical people.... Read more »

Why I won't say "f*ck cancer" anymore

After a two-day vigil, six weeks of hospice care and six years of lows and victories managing cancer, my mother-in-law died. She didn’t lose. No tangible enemy bested her. She died. Later, a family member sobbed, “how could this great woman be taken down like this?” I thought for the 83rd time that week, as... Read more »

The great, unstoppable Maria Karvunidis is gone

Sadly, I have the honor of writing the obituary for my mother-in-law, the legendary Maria Karvunidis. I missed her from the moment she took her last breath in our arms. The following will appear in the Chicago Tribune this Sunday and next week in The Evanston Review. — Maria Lieselotte Karvunidis, 68, of Lake Geneva,... Read more »

All the things that suck about cancer - a list!

Three times this week, the anniversary of losing one of our twins in utero, someone has randomly brought up the missing twin. These are nice people, all well-intended. One is a sweet little lady who reminds me of a pretty koala. She’s a friend-of-a-friend on Facebook and we happened to meet in person at a... Read more »

Crap justice alert: Felony for helping ducklings

A lady was convicted of “criminal” negligence in a Canadian court this week because she did something stoopid (but with a warm, fuzzy heart!). In 2010 Emma Czornobaj pulled her car over in the left lane of the highway to help some orphaned baby ducks who might need their pinafores tucked in or something, but... Read more »

There are two of me

A midwife I’d barely met tapped into something very astute about me when I was in labor. A few hours previously, I had rejected her suggestion of narcotics for pain because, well, the word “narcotic” scared me. Wasn’t that for druggies on the news? Krokodil and crack pipes, etcetera? (I feel like an old person... Read more »

Grief: I'm a cold, terrible person I guess

I already tagged this post, “Being German” and I don’t even know where it’s going yet. I just know it’s going to have something to do with my steely exterior and love of non-sweet sweets. Seriously, ever try cake and coffee in Germany? It’s like washing down a chalk waffle with tar and we like... Read more »