Gender-neutral kids are bait for bullies, but have awesome names

Five years after the birth of her child, a self-proclaimed radical feminist in the U.K. has revealed the gender of her child. Sasha, it turns out, is a boy. Cigars all around! But for the last five years and for the foreseeable future, this family is committed to erasing "overtly masculine" elements from their son's life, dressing him in pink swimsuits, flowery tops and apparently wings and tutus. Doesn't Sasha look positively thrilled in this 2010 family Christmas card?


These people are not alone. Remember baby Pop in Sweden? And what about baby Storm in Canada? (Pop! Storm! More on that in a minute.) These families are committed to keeping the gender of their babies private well into toddlerhood and beyond.

On the one hand, I get it. Sort of. What's between a person's legs is a private matter and certainly the unique functions of the vajay versus the peen aren't even relevant until much later. So fine, protect modesty.

But isn't there more to gender than the function at the junction? Like teaching little people how to be men and women?  It's one thing if a child decides for himself that he's a fierce diva in a Daphne costume. If I ever had a son and he wanted to wear pink nail polish, I'd  let him do whatever made him happy. But denying a little boy trucks and monsters seems kind of cruel as well.

Also, there is the matter of safeguarding kids against bullying based on confused gender roles. A new study reveals elementary kids base their taunts on gender non-conformity. So putting your unsuspecting son in a flowery top is a good idea because  . . . ?

Maybe the real focus should be on these gender-neutral names. Storm has a sibling named Jazz. How festive! If you plan on not revealing the gender of your child, ever, you need to think beyond "Avery" and "Grayson". Go the way of the Pop.

Here are my baby name suggestions for parents concealing gender information:









You're welcome, four families out there who are considering this path.


Filed under: Hippies, Menz


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  • I love it when parents name their girls boy names. I have a female colleague named Kevin Michael. I'd go western with Cheyenne, new agey would be Quartz or Rose Quartz, and then there's always Blue Ivy Carter. ;)

  • In reply to STS Chicago:

    I never considered Kevin for girl. Interesting!

    I end up feeling bad for the boys who already have those names. Somehow when a girl has a boy's name, it's cool or cute, but when a boy has a girl's name people think it's, well, a girl's name.

    Some "girls" names I love on men are Shannon and Stacey.

  • I loathe giving boys names to girls. My two biggest naming pet peeves are:

    1. "Creative" spellings for common names, such as Izayah. Vowels are not interchangeable!

    2. Boys names for girls. Ugh!

    I do however Love non-name names. As a child I was obsessed with the Outsiders and the names of the Curtis brothers, Soda Pop and Pony Boy. 30 years later and I still love them

  • In reply to code14j:

    I think you would love my boy name. It's almost the single compelling reason for me to have a third child.

  • Let your kid be themselves and decide for themselves what they like and don't like. Why is that such a difficult concept for people? I'm not going to dress my son up in a pink tutu or take away his cars (oh, the drama that would cause!). I'm also not going to take away a baby doll if he decides he wants to play with it. He's a kid. He doesn't think about gender roles too much. All he knows is that it's really pretty fun to crash his matchbox cars.

    To the parents in question: quit running a social experiment on your own kid. He's not a puppy. He's a human being.

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