Did you know this was a thing? On TLC's "My Strange Addiction" last night they featured an adult who sleeps in a crib, sucks on a binkie, wears huge baby clothes and spends 24 hours a day sitting in pee because "there's nothing more comfortable than a warm, wet diaper". Gag.
And what is the appeal there? When I was a real baby I was itching to sprout working legs and run off to the land of tube tops and sweet freedom. It killed me to be a baby! I don't care if I was a floating head in a jar, I'd find a way to weave my pillow case into an escape rope with my teeth and crawl to a cab. Adult babies are the opposite of that. Plus gross.
But this phenomenon of the adult baby is not news. Stanley Thorton Jr., a famous adult baby, was featured on National Geographic for his infantile lifestyle without shame. They have giant cribs and custom footie pajamas and tons of websites on which to lavish in their lifestyles. Stanley weighs 350 pounds, just to give you a visual.
I have a problem with this. Adult babies are creating a serious environmental problem with all these disposable diapers. TLC estimated the star of their show last night goes through 1,000 a year. A thousand! Giant diapers! In the landfills! This is a problem, people. If you're going to let your freak flag fly, at least use cloth.
I had the opportunity to pose the question of using adult-sized cloth diapers to an online adult baby today and the answer was no, not interested. She said the crinkly, disposable kind were more reminiscent of childhood in the 80's.
Ah, we have a clue. Adult babies remember being in diapers. Americans are potty-training later and later and a few of those crumbs are breeding weird subcultures of people who like to pee on themselves. Yes! There! I said it and all my mom friends can be pissed off right now. (I love making myself popular.)
In the 1940's children used to be potty trained in America around 18 months, a time frame mirrored around the world. Then in the 60's and 70's, two-years-old became the norm. Now kids are wearing diapers well beyond three. And when did the "adult baby" phenomenon spring out into the open? Well. That part is hard to determine. But play along here and assume our grannies were not laying around in their poop.
I usually don't have a problem with freaks. Hey, if toe-sucking or rock-eating is your thing, have at it. But adult babies just really disgust me. It's the epitome of weakness. They care more about their stupid fetish than the Earth. Lame!
Filed under: Unpopular Opinions