When the Pabst Blue Ribbon beer company changed owners last year, a flock of executives responsible for the successful grass-roots marketing that put the company's beer in the pale, sad hands of hipsters everywhere, flew the coup. Not only did they quit under the new management, whose only crimes were to do whatever they wanted since it's their own damn company, the former PBR employees formed a smear campaign.
Reports the Chicago Tribune . . .
"Now many former executives who helped breathe life into [Pabst Blue Ribbon's] stale brands, such as Schlitz and Old Style, and helped PBR become the fastest-growing national beer in 2009 and 2010, are on a different kind of campaign.
"I want it to fail,'' said Bryan Clarke, former vice president of marketing.
His wrath is aimed at billionaire C. Dean Metropoulos and his two sons, who took control of the Woodridge-based company a year ago. "I hope they lose every dollar they have. If our core PBR drinker knew that what they were drinking is owned by guys like these, it's the last beer they'd want to drink.'' (MORE)
Oh, whaddaya know. Hipsters whining. Taking a stand against the man. Being true. Well guess what, crybabies? It's BEER. It's brewed by the Miller Brewing company. You know, those same guys who brew all the other watered down American beer? The only difference is Pabst Blue Ribbon pays skateboarders to ride around with its logos. You're so rad! (But hmm . . . you loved it then, and hate it now . At least the big American beer executives are finally admitting their beverage was never about taste!)
If you really want to take a stand, walk the Slut Walk against rape. Donate your time and voice to organizations that matter, like Care For Real, who is losing their north side space where they have been over-serving their community for 40 years. Or help a city neighborhood get a park.
I get it. Kind of. The ad execs are sad because they put their hearts into their work, only to watch their calculated coolness evaporate at the hands of the mean new bosses. I still have no sympathy. It's a job. You do it and you move on. And how flippant to the people in this country hurting for jobs that these hipster dork ad guys are so painfully self-righteous that they are eager to commit career suicide over such idiotic scruples. It's beer! Who cares if the new boss wants to advertise with mainstream beach towels!
Do more with your time, Bryan Clarke, former vice president of marketing. You know, stand up for something that actually matters. Like dairy addiction awareness. Not your beer.
Jenna Karvunidis is a Chicago-area writer, opinion-giver, sewer, crafter, on-camera talent, boo-boo kisser and wishes the demise of the term "mommy blogger". She may be reached at firstname.lastname@example.org, on twitter @HighGlossSauce or found picking play dough out of her sofa.