Shirataki noodles - they stink and don't eat them.
In my quest to be a milf*, I have had to diet after having the baby. I kind of like dieting. It gives me (more) something(s) to obsess about and makes me feel smart that I can add. Anyway, I've lost 32 pounds in twelve weeks. Okay, eight of those pounds were the baby but I deserve a low five anyway. LOW FIVE!
In this process I have discovered a food so foul your nostril hairs will burn off. This food is so stinky and disgusting, it's amazing it is marketed as food at all. They are shirataki noodles and they will melt your face with their stench.
I should have been warned. Right there on the package it says, "rinse well for 3-4 minutes to decrease the natural aroma". If the natural aroma is so foul it needs to be rinsed off, I've got news - you just wasted your $2.95 because you will not be eating that. Oh, and then you're supposed to dry them off with a towel. You can't dry the stink off!
The last eleven pounds will have to come off the old fashioned way. By starving.
Not her. She's fine with a fudgecicle.
*Me, I'm like fancy