The Walking Dead review, "Infected"

The Walking Dead review, "Infected"

I guess they're not farmers anymore.

The folks at Old New Otherton were living a pretty happy, secure existence during the Walking Dead hiatus, but now that the show is back, zombie threat level is blood red. In tonight's episode, "Infected," our zeroes are forced to deal with an infection within their walls, a sickness that is threatening to kill them all, the great Swine Flu of the Zombpocalypse.

No one realized that Patrick died in the shower, so he was allowed to become zombie-alive and attack the cell block. He took out Random Guy, which was really sad because we had all grown so attached to Random Guy. And then the two of them infect a few more people, including Dad and Woman. Carol drags Dad into a cell and goes to work preparing to perform an amputation, because Carol is all things now. She's a teacher and a cook and a psychologist and, apparently, a medical doctor. But then Carol notices that Dad has not just been bitten on the arm, but also on the back of the neck. She consults her biology text book and learns that you cannot amputate a patient's head and expect him to live. So she sits by Dad's side and waits for him to die.

His daughters come in to say goodbye to their father and Carol tells them, "That's all well and good girls, but if you want to make it in this world, you gotta be tough!" Then she hands one of the girls a knife and commands her to kill her own father. The girl balks and Carol shoves the implement right in Dad's ear because that's how Carol rolls these days. She is NOT about to let some fucking zombie take her down before she gets a chance to seal the deal with Daryl. No cot-damn way.

Meanwhile, out in the hallway, Daryl and Rick are doing their own zombie dance, killing walkers left and right. It's the first time in a long time that Rick has been so free with his zombie stabbing. He and his knife have been reunited and it feels, yes, so good.

After the zombies have been subdued (and Indian Doctor has told our zeroes the score), Rick calls a meeting of the Braintrust -- namely Hershel, Carol, Daryl, and Judith, probably. The group decides to quarantine anyone who seems ill, or who may have been exposed to the pig virus, or who just looks like kind of a dick. They hear Tyreese's girlfriend (who has a name now, and it's KAREN, so you know she's not long for this world) coughing out in the hallway. So they drag her by her hair onto Death Row, where they are now housing all the sickos. She winds up there with David from Decatur who once told a racist knock-knock joke that offended Carol, so, you see, he gots to go.

After all of the Unclean have been rounded up, Carol takes the newly orphaned girls out on the grounds to kick them when they're down. She calls the girl who wouldn't kill her father a pansy. The sister says that she was just sad about their Dad dying, and Carol slaps the girl across the face and tells her that she'll give her something to cry about.

Daryl and Rick's bonding over grave digging gets cut short when the outside fence starts collapsing. There's a panic and lots of zombie killing and whatnot and someone notices that there are some rat carcasses just beyond the fence. Someone has been feeding the zombies. Rick makes a point of mentioning that he had been petitioning for a "Don't Feed the Zombies" sign for the past several months but no one would take him seriously, and then he pokes a few walkers in the eyeballs. There's no way to kill them all, so Rick and Daryl jump in the truck, drive out of the gates, and lure the zombies away from the fence with their last three little piggies (who may have been infected by the flu, so win-win for everyone, except Rick's dreams for county fair glory).

Rick uses their apparently unlimited supply of gasoline to burn down the pigpen. He calls Carl over and surprises him with his very own gun. Rick wraps his own holster around his waist and the two of them are back in the zombie-killing, crime-fighting business, and just in time, because there's a mystery to be solved!

Who burned Karen and David? It's like what happened to Nikki and Paulo on LOST, except we amazingly care even less about Karen and David than we did about Nikki and Paulo.

Seriously. Who gassed 'em and burned 'em? And is this the same person who has been feeding the walkers? Here's our list of suspects:

Carol: She's all about culling the herd and self-preservation.

Beth: It's always the sweet ones. She gave a big speech this episode about having to do dangerous things when you care about people. She revealed last week that she no longer grieves for the people she loses.

Carl: He likes taking matters into his own hands. He was with his father when he burned down the pig pen. Maybe that can of gasoline gave him the idea.

Dad's daughters: Carol has turned the two of them into hardass bitches.

Glenn: He's all about protecting Maggie.

D'Angelo Barksdale: We still don't know his name or know much about him. Is he the type of person who would drag people from their cells and burn them alive? I'm gonna guess probably.

Hershel: No one would suspect him. I bet he was in cahoots with Indian Doctor.

Judith: She showed impressive motor skills while playing those red plastic cups in this episode. She's either a future flip cup champion or a pyromaniac murderess.

Someone else? Angel T-Dog?

Other Stuff:

  • Oh, yeah. Michonne was in this episode. Babies make her cry. Did she lose a baby at some point? This is more character development we've seen for Michonne since, well, ever.
  • Maybe Rick can wipe away her tears. #Richonne4EVA
  • Glenn's the type of guy who takes pictures of his girlfriend when she's sleeping. I think, on some level, we knew this all along.
  • Now that the pigs are gone, is the source of the illness gone? Or did the sickness come from somewhere else -- i.e. the water supply or Daryl not properly cleaning his zombie-gut-covered arrows before killing deer?
  • Carol's child molester-y, "Don't tell your father" conversation was not even the creepiest thing she did this episode.

What did you think of this episode? And seriously, WHO KILLED DAVID AND WHAT'S HER FACE?

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