Countdown to Skyfall: Diamonds Are Forever (1971)

Countdown to Skyfall: Diamonds Are Forever (1971)

DIAMONDS ARE FOREVER (1971)

BOND: Sean Connery

DIRECTOR: Guy Hamilton (Goldfinger)

BOND GIRL(S): Jill St. John (Tiffany Case); Lana Wood (Plenty O'Toole)

COOL GADGETS: False fingerprints; voice disguiser.

THEME SONG: "Diamonds Are Forever," sung by Shirley Bassey.  One of my favorite Bond themes.  Kanye West used the chorus to brilliant effect in his "Diamonds from Sierra Leone" track.

IMDB PLOT SUMMARY: A diamond smuggling investigation leads James Bond to Las Vegas, where he uncovers an extortion plot headed by his nemesis, Ernst Stavro Blofeld.

ICONIC MOMENTS: Probably the scene where two gymnastic femme fatales named Bambi and Thumper give Bond a good ass-whupping.

FUN FACTS: Connery donated his entire salary from this movie to charity.  The actor playing Mr. Wynt is Bruce Glover: Crispin's dad.

VERDICT: After the disappointment of On Her Majesty's Secret Service, the producers tried to recapture past glories by bringing back the creative team behind the most iconic film in the franchise, Goldfinger.  The magic was gone by this point though.  Connery looks like he'd rather be anywhere than here.  The plot is lame-brained and ridiculous, even by Bond standards.  Something about diamonds being used to fund a space laser.  I gave up on it about halfway through.  The action is weak, and the new actor playing Blofeld (Charles Gray) is the worst one yet.  The only real bright spot is the odd villainous duo of Mr. Kidd and Mr. Wynt.  These are strange guys, unlike any we've seen in a Bond movie so far, and, oh yeah, they're also gay for good measure.  But their ties to the main plot are rather tangential, and they don't make much of an impact on the overall entertainment value of the film.   Diamonds may be forever, but this is not one for the ages.  The worst Bond outing so far.

GRADE: C-

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