Movie Review: Priest (*) Will Molest Your Wallet

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Not to be confused with the similarly titled 1994 indie drama about a gay man of the cloth, this Priest is a super-dumb, hacked-to-pieces action film that, like its vampire characters, never should have seen the light of day.  Directed by visual effects man Scott Stewart, Priest plays like some weird mix of Blade Runner, Mad Max, and Resident Evil, with a religious bent.  Oh, and with vampires thrown in because...well, why not?  If the mention of those movies perks your interest, don't let it.  To even put Priest in the same sentence does those movies a dishonor.  Despite the presence of several talented actors (Paul Bettany, Karl Urban, Maggie Q), Priest is unintentionally bad - it comes off like a fake Grindhouse flick that isn't in on the joke.  It runs a scant 87 minutes, but even that feels long.  You can tell the original cut of this movie ran 2.5 hours.  The studio saw it, recognized the fact that it sucked, and commanded that the filmmakers shave an hour off just so audiences can get in, get out, and not even realize they've been had.  Memo to Bettany: no more religious-themed movies.  Cool motorcycles though.  * out of 5 stars.

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Tags: film, movies, Paul Bettany, Priest, reviews

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