In the immortal words of modern sage Homer Simpson, "Kids, you tried your best and you failed miserably. The lesson is, never try."
That's kind of how it felt last night on the season premiere of Project Runway when we saw two designers get away with doing basically nothing. One made pants out of pants and the other turned a kimono backwards. They each smacked their designs on the rear and sent them down the runway with minor alterations.
But not everyone was a miserable talentless cheater (Like Alex on Top Chef. Grrr). Here's how it went down on the PR:
The task of the day was for the contestants to choose an article of clothing from each of their own suitcases and incorporate it (or "implicate" it, according to Ivy) into their first ever Project Runway design. But! There was a twist. After choosing their article of clothing, they were told to pass the item to the person on their right! Shenanigans!
The other twist was that the designers were only given five hours to complete the challenge -- the shortest amount of time ever allotted on Project Runway - and a fact that special guest former-celebrity judge Selma Blair (Who had previously won some international "Best Dressed" award. Which "Best Dressed" Award? I have no idea) felt the need to point out every five seconds during the judging panel. History!
Oh, and the third twist of the night was that this design challenge was the contestants' final piece of the Project Runway audition. There were 17 designers, but only 16 beds. So they weren't even technically on the show yet. Even though they were on the show. I mean, we could see them all last night. Did they not know this? How can one be on the show, yet not be "on the show?" One of life's great mysteries.
In the end, poor construction and laziness won out over horrendous styling, as so often happens in life. Tim Gunn was a golden god, and all was right with the world.
What did you think of the season premiere? Who are you rooting for at this early date? Come follow me on Twitter (@ExMagistra
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