Adventures In Maj Jong Land, A True Story

If it’s Wednesday In Arizona, it’s time for Maj Jong!

Last Wednesday, Wifey hosted Maj Jong for the first time in our Arizona home. The ladies arrived for the big game. Stakes are serious as it’s possible for someone to lose as much as $5 for the afternoon.

As usual the ladies sat down for a nice lunch. Then it was game time.

Game on!

The tiles were placed or should I say thrown or dropped on the kitchen table. Unfortunately, in their exuberance to get the game underway, the tiles had minds of their own and went this way and that. Suddenly from the other room, I heard the crash as tiles hit the floor.

After all were collected, the ladies placed the tiles face up on the table. Horror upon horror, one was missing.

Where was the 4 Crack?

Down on the floor went the four ladies, such a sight you can’t imagine. Was it under the stove?

No!

The dishwasher?

Nope!

The refrigerator?

Again no!

Alas, what could they do? Would the game be called due to lost tile? (Had to check the international rules committee to get a ruling on that one. unfortunately, there is no such thing as an international rules committee!)

Our ladies decided to use a blank tile as the substitute for the missing one.

“No problem” said Wifey, “the cleaning crew is coming tomorrow and they are very thorough. If it’s here, they’ll find it.”

Cleaning crew arrives, does its thing, but no tile is to be found. Back on the floor with a yardstick goes Wifey to check once more on the status of what’s under the appliances. Once again nothing is found.

Enter the male (yours truly). Applause for the hero is now appropriate. Upon opening the dishwasher to remove the clean dishes, I noticed a white rectangular object in the bottom of the dishwasher. Picking it up I saw the cleanest maj tile in the western world.

Hope you enjoyed the laugh. I surely did!

I hate old lady drivers.

Today after returning from a nice walk, along with a passenger, I was in the car heading home. Getting to main six-lane street, I was in the right turn lane in a state where right-turn-on-red is permitted.

You guessed it.

A lady of advanced age was in the first car in line to turn right. Ample space was available to make said turn, in fact the left turn light was on. Did she turn? NO!

The car immediately in front of me blared his horn. So did I

Soon we had missed two lights and still she did not turn. Many cars were now sounding there horns. Was there movement in front of me?

Again no!

After missing two lights, my passenger got out of the car, walked to the offender and knocked on the car window. The lady inside was reading some instruction manual and oblivious to the world around her. So he pulled out his Glock 9(Arizona is carry state). He shot her, got in the car and pushed her aside and drove the car around the corner and jumped back in my car.

Well not really. He nicely explained that she should get her old ass in gear so the rest of the world could move on.

Finally, she realized where she was and all was once again right with the world, except there should be a way to jolt daydreamers back to life so the rest of us could use our vehicles as they are meant to be used.

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