"I've been a jerk and I owe you an apology."
Since I started writing this blog, I've had so much feedback from other people who are as grateful for their jobs, but as miserable as me. I've heard so many stories of how awful people are being treated at work. For those of you that may be reading this blog for the first time, or may have missed a previous post, here's a recap of some of the things we've discussed thus far; In my very first blog "Could You Work In A Place Like This", I shared a story from a friend who works in a restaurant where employees have to come to work sick, have to endure racial slurs and are basically being treated like crap. In another post "If I Give You Money, You're Gonna Have Sex With Me, Right?" I talked about a friend of mine who has a co-worker that tried to get him fired because he refused to be bought and sold for a few home cooked meals and some cash. Last week's article, "Grandma, Can You Beat Up My 6th Grade Teacher, Please?" the story of another friend, a teacher, who found herself locked in her classroom while a student's mother, aunt and grandmother attempted to break into her class to beat her up.
As you can see, there are people out there that are working under some pretty difficult situations. And, there are many more awful experiences to share. That's great for this blog, but not so great for the people behind the stories. Every time I write a new blog, whether it's about me or someone else, I can't help but think about how things went wrong and what might make it better. It occurred to me that there are a lot of people in the world who deserve an apology. I thought maybe we should plan some sort of sit in. Where people all around the world sit together and hold hands until we get the "I'm sorry's" we deserve. Of course, I know that will never happen, but I can dream, right?
But, since I know that most of us will never actually receive that apology, I decided to apologize to you on their behalf. Look over the list below to find your bad work situation, close your eyes, get a clear picture of the person who owes you the apology in your mind and imagine them saying the appropriate "I'm Sorry" to you. I've made some suggestions on how the apology might sound.
To the employee who has that controlling boss who's constantly on your back and your nerves, image them saying these words to you "I know my controlling ways make you want to choke the shit out of me. Thank you for not doing that. And, I apologize for being such a jackass! Hopefully, one day, I'll get the counseling I need so I can stop making your life here so much harder. Hopefully, you'll find another job soon so that you can quit without any notice and make me look like even more of the jackass I am!"
To the person who has that clingy co-worker who just won't leave them alone; "I'm sorry I'm so annoying and make your life at work hell. It's just that I'm really insecure and I can't help but attach myself to other people because I'm so dysfunctional. I'm probably going to continue to annoy you until I get some help, but I want you to know that one day I might just leave you the hell alone!"
To my friend who almost got fired for NOT sleeping with his co-worker; "I'm sorry I tried to make you lose your job because I couldn't deal with your rejection. My husband and my boyfriend don't give me enough attention so I'm desperate and disgusting. I hope you can forgive me.
To my friend whose student tried to have her beat up; "I apologize that my upbringing is so ridiculous that it seemed like beating you up was the appropriate thing to do. I guess I should thank you for not letting my daughter put on some other girls lip gloss. I should have thanked you a long time ago for all the extra hours you've spent tutoring my kid since I'm too much of a loser to do it myself. It's going to be hard to get her through the 6th grade without your help, but I've learned my lesson. I will never try to beat you up another teacher again for trying to give my daughter the training and education that I'm too dumb to provide for her.
To the employee who is overworked and underpaid; "I'm aware that you deserve more money than we pay you. It's just that I'm a greedy prick and I'm not willing to pay you what you're worth. I want you to know how much we appreciate all the hard work you do. Maybe one day I'll get over myself and tell this selfish company how much you're really worth. In the meantime, this apology is all I can do."
If your situation doesn't fit any of these, try this one; I know working with me is difficult and I'm sorry I'm so (fill in the blank). It's just that I'm dumb and I don't know any better. Hopefully, one day you'll learn to ignore me all together."
Feel free to make up your own if none of the one's listed above work for you. The important thing is that you get the apology you deserve, even if it is from someone you've never met.
Hopefully, that made you feel a little better and you can go to work with a smile on your face. So, have a great day at work today, or, at the very least, don't do anything that will get you fired and/or arrested!
The Working Poor
Would you like to share your awful work experience? E-mail me at Gratefulbutmiserable@gmail.com I will not tell anyone it's you.