Women will spend more time choosing a pair of shoes than they will choosing a man. I'm a woman and we all love shoes. We will see a pair of shoes. We ooh and ahh over them and we might even try them on. We leave the store because we need time to think about whether or not we should purchase the shoes. A week later we return to the store and decide to make the purchase because we just can't live without them. There are some women who don't spend a fraction of that amount of time checking out a man before jumping right in to date him.
Let's talk about Tina (not her real name). She is a single mom with three young children. She moves into a nice apartment and she is doing well for herself because she can afford the rent of around $1500 - $1800 per month. Tina starts dating Greg almost a year after moving into her new apartment. The neighbors don't think too highly of Greg because they always see him in different cars and according to them he looks shady.
One night Greg gets shot outside of Tina's house. The police are called and concerned neighbors are outside talking to police at midnight. The police inform the neighbors that Greg has lied about what happened. Greg claims that someone jumped out of a parked car and just began shooting at him and then ran down the street. The police believe that Greg and his shooter were involved in a shoot out. They found two different shell casings on the scene. This would explain why a man with a gun leaves his car and runs down the street after shooting someone. He couldn't take time to get in in car a drive away because he was being shot at.
After Greg was taken to the hospital for treatment, the neighbors continued to talk to police. Tina's landlord was called several times but she never answered her phone. The police were winding down their investigation when the neighbors spotted Tina and her children trying to sneak into her car to leave. Why do I say she was sneaking? Tina didn't attempt to exit thru her front door. She walked a block down the alley to come around to the front of the house to her car. The neighbors alerted the police and they questioned her before letting her drive off with her kids in tow.
Tina did not come home the next day. She came home two days later for a short time and left again. Tina told her landlord that the incident was completely random. In a previous post, I talk about how most crimes are not random and the victims know their assailants.
As news spread of the shooting, the neighbors voiced their concerns. The general consensus was that Tina needed to move. Most of the homes on Tina's street are single family homes so the neighbors are very concerned about crime. Chicago has been hit with a wave of shootings this year but this was a safe neighborhood. The neighbors want to keep their neighborhood safe. Englewood and Roseland didn't become crime magnets overnight, it happened over time and began with an incident such as this one.
Tina has exposed her children to a man who was almost killed and who tried to kill someone else. The bullets could have struck a window and injured or killed anyone on that street, including Tina and her children. The neighbors saw Greg as being shady so why didn't Tina see it? Did she not care? Did Tina really get to know Greg or was she impressed by his nice cars and money?
Tina and her children now have an unstable home life, her neighbors are mad and want her kicked out of her apartment. Will Tina continue to date Greg? I hope not. There are too many stories about children being harmed or killed due to a mother's boyfriend's indiscretions. I hope that she will spend a reasonable amount of time vetting her next boyfriend because if she doesn't, her children could pay a high price.