Thanks Derrick Rose For (potentially) Adding to the 73% of Black Children Born Out of Wedlock

It has been reported that Derrick Rose and his girlfriend are expecting their first child.  I used the word "potentially" because their is still time for Derrick Rose to marry his girlfriend before their child is born.

Do I expect Derrick to be a role model? Hell yes, but only to his own child.  Parents need to stop using famous people as role models because most of them are sure to disappoint.

I have mixed feelings about this situation.  On one hand I hope that this was a joint decision.  On the other hand, I hope that they did not plan to have a child out of wedlock.  If it was not a joint decision, how could he be so stupid?  In a recent interview for GQ magazine, Derrick made the following statement:

"I won't ever put myself in a bad position so that people can say bad things about me," he says. "I make smart decisions, and my friends and my family, they are all there for the right reason. I'm very mature for 23 years old, and I know that whatever I do can hurt someone."

Sorry Derrick, but you made it really easy. Here is a little quote that I like to share with young people:
EVERY TIME YOU HAVE SEX WITHOUT USING A CONDOM, YOU GIVE SOMEONE ELSE THE POWER TO CHANGE YOUR LIFE FOREVER!(Feel free to tweet this quote but give me credit) Welcome to fatherhood, I hope you're ready.

Now on to Jay Cutler.  Same stupid shit, different person!  Why don't athletes ever learn? Jay started dating his girl friend and fell in love really fast and got engaged.  Then he got cold feet and got unengaged.  They reunited and got re-engaged and now they are having a baby.  No plans to set a wedding date.

Now on to the biggest idiot in sports, Antonio Cromartie.  He has 10 kids by eight different women in six states.  Oh and he and his wife are now expecting twins!  WTF!!!  According to Fox Sports he struggled to say the names of all of his children on HBO's "Hard Knocks".  The New York Post, states that Cromartie makes child support payments of $3,500 per month to his babies' mamas.  Someone needs to stop the spreading of his seeds.  It takes more than money to be a father.  He can't effectively be a father to eight of his children because they live in different states.

According to Child Trends a whopping 73% of black children and 29% of white children are born out of wedlock! Studies have shown that the family structure can have a profound effect on a child's social and emotional well being.  Children living in single parent homes are less likely to exhibit behavioral self control and are more likely to be exposed to aggravated parenting.  Research has shown that income differential doesn't fully account for the negative effects on the areas of a child's well-being associated with living in a single parent household.  Even though all of the babies' mamas will be getting fat checks, their children's social and emotional well-being is at risk.

Professional athletes don't have a great track record when it comes to managing and saving their money.  Approximately 60% of NBA players are broke with in 5 years of retiring.  As for players in the NFL, 78% of them are in financial distress with in 2 years of retiring.  With many of them having children out of wedlock, what happens to their children when they run out of money?  Many of the mothers may be relying completely on child support to pay the bills.  I know this is wrong but all they had to do was put on a condom.  Its difficult for adults to deal with the loss of a large income and very difficult for children to understand and adjust.  For some of these children, money may be the only thing that they get from their father.  When the money is gone, they have nothing.

When you bring a child into the world, there are responsibilities that must be taken serious.  These statistics are awful and when people have children out of wedlock, they are responsible for making the stats worse.  Just because you make a lot of money, doesn't mean you will be a good parent.  These athletes are off to a bad start by not using a condom, while engaging in sex.  Condoms not only prevent pregnancy, they also prevent sexually transmitted diseases, some of which are incurable and may even be fatal.  Parents are responsible for teaching their children to make the right choices in life.  I can only hope that these athletes make better choices in the future.

The stats listed above are mind-blowing and deserve adequate attention.  Tune in on Tuesday when I discuss the statistics on children born out of wedlock from a non-professional athlete prospective.

 

 

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  • On the other hand, Rose has about $240 million in guaranteed money ($96 million on the Bulls contract, supposedly $150 million on a shoe contract), so he can pay child support and won't be on Maury. About the same for Cutler.

    The last I heard, Urlacher has 3 kids and isn't married.

    I don't who Rose's girlfriend is, but the Urlacher case (and Wilt Chamberlain having more women than points, and Magic Johnson having that HIV thing) at least brings up the issue what kind of women are "laying down" for any jock. In Urlacher's case, the one that also went after the Lord of the Orilsh Dance, we sort of know.

    So, while there is a lack of a condom, there also seems to be something else going on here. Maybe you can expound on that.

  • In reply to jack:

    Jack, I am a fair person. The women are not off the hook by no means! They will be addressed in part two. Tune in on Tuesday.

  • My favorite line: "Do I expect Derrick to be a role model? Hell yes, but only to his own child."

  • And Tracy, thanks for speaking up for marriage!

  • Wow. Judgmental. And borderline asinine, as your tone goes.

    I guess it's trendy to swoop on an athlete who's on the front of a magazine. Derrick Rose is actually one of the good guys. But I suppose that doesn't make a difference to you.

    "I won't ever put myself in a bad position so that people can say bad things about me," Rose says.

    Don't worry, Derrick, Tracy will find something. Especially if it presents the opportunity to grandstand, and call you an idiot.

  • Andy,
    I'm not saying that Derrick is a bad guy.   His actions are not very responsible and not very smart.  If pointing out a sad epidemic that is effecting millions of children is grand standing, then I will just have to take your hit.  I see the effects of single parent homes in children every day.  I'm talking about children of very wealthy people, poor people and middle class people.  If you are not married and never read my asinine blog again remember this quote from me:
    Every time you have sex without using a condom, you give someone else the power to change your life forever.

  • As long as Derrick and his girlfriend are together- married or not- their child won't be raised in a single-parent household.

    Having a child "in wedlock" doesn't mean a child won't wind up in a single-parent household, considering the divorce rates in this country.

    My oldest son was born in August of 1991, 7 months after his mother and I got married, so he was born "in wedlock". We got divorced the following summer, so he spent 17 years in a single-parent household despite being born "in wedlock".

    I'm all with the author in being against children having to be raised with only one parent in the house, but when you start talking about "out of wedlock", the tone of the article completely changes.

  • "but when you start talking about "out of wedlock", the tone of the article completely changes."
    That is my point!
    Children who are raised in single parent homes after a divorce do not suffer the same fate as those born out of wedlock.

  • In reply to Tracy A. Stanciel:

    I agree with Don. I think your personal, judgmental tone is an unnecessary crutch that unhinges an otherwise good argument.

    If you want to profile a Chicago Bull who has really done a bang-up job on fatherhood, you should profile Jason Caffey, who won two rings with Jordan in 96 and 97. He's back about $200,000 of child support for starters.

    Going after Derrick Rose, a good guy, before he's had a chance to prove himself is a very Rush Limbaugh thing to do.

  • In reply to Tracy A. Stanciel:

    "Children who are raised in single parent homes after a divorce do not suffer the same fate as those born out of wedlock"

    Tracy, what's the difference in a child whose parents were never married, and a child whose parents divorced when the child was less than a year old? Either way, the child never knows a two-parent household.

    And isn't a child who is born "out of wedlock" but whose parents live in the same home and raise the child together BETTER OFF than a child whose parents were married briefly but spent less than a year raising the child together?

  • In reply to Don Ellis:

    Don, you could be right, there probably isn't much difference when two people divorce shortly after a child is born. When doing my research, the studies didn't talk about how long couples were married. I appreciate that you can respectfully disagree with me. Thanks for the comments.

  • In reply to Tracy A. Stanciel:

    "That is my point!
    Children who are raised in single parent homes after a divorce do not suffer the same fate as those born out of wedlock."

    I completely disagree with you. Unless you've lived this, you have no point of reference and no idea what you're talking about. My parents got married BECAUSE my mother got pregnant (she had an ovarian cyst and wasn't supposed to have kids, shows how much doctors know). They ended up divorced a year later and extremely bitter towards each other. This led to problems in custody, visitation, child support, and overall a poor environment to grow up in.

    Alternately, had they stayed friends and avoided the marriage fiasco they might've avoided many fights I witnessed growing up. It's never a good idea to get married just because you get someone pregnant. I don't care how right you or people like you think it is, it's a terrible idea to try and live with someone you don't know only because they're carrying your child. Obviously the responsible thing to do is plan your future and be prepared, but not everybody does that and mistakes happen. Better to offer two good homes than one broken home.

  • Marriage is golden. Derrick, do the right thing man. The knee injury gives you plenty of time to plan a wedding. Great blog post Tracy.

  • In reply to Garrard McClendon:

    Thanks Garrard! The black family seems be becoming extinct. A piece of paper may not mean anything to the adults but it means a lot to the children. Thanks for reading!

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