In a recent Huffington Post article, Debra Ollivier wrote about parents' opinions regarding allowing teenagers to have sex at home. To my surprise, there were parents who actually support the idea! Here is an excerpt from the article that made my eyes bulge and my hair stand up.
Those "open-minded people" make up the second camp of parents out there who prefer that their teens have sex in the home because it's a less risky and more natural way to develop a healthy sense of sexuality. My friend, who has three teen daughters, summed up the views expressed by that camp: "After I've ascertained that my daughter is in a relationship that's based on love and trust, and that it's not about a booty call, then I'm okay with it. In fact, I want her sexual experience to be positive, pleasurable, even fantastic. Teens are entitled to have sex and sexual pleasure, and there's no better place than home, which is clean and safe. I don't want to interfere. But of course, if my daughter has a rotating band of boyfriends, on the other hand, then no. There's no way I'm going to let her have sex at home."
A parent said that she wanted her daughter to have a positive, pleasurable and even fantastic experience! Take a moment and reflect on your most pleasurable, fantastic sexual experience. Now, think about your teenage daughter having that same experience in your home. Do you feel ill? I sure do.
So if you were crazy enough to buy into this nonsense, how would it work? Would you sit the lovely couple down in your living room and talk to them about birth control? How about asking them, what type of sex they would like to engage in. Do you share your personal experiences with the lovely couple? Lets say that you are into oral, anal, S &M and things on the freak scale from 0 to 100. You want your child to have a fantastic experience right? Why not teach the young man how to properly pleasure your daughter. Sex is a shared experience, so you must teach your daughter how to pleasure her boyfriend. Don't be shy about showing the lovely couple a little porn to help with various techniques. Do you consult with the other teen's parents? What do you say to the lovely couple if the other parents don't agree that the teens should be having sex?
Using the notion that teens will have sex anyway, to rationalize the support for letting them have sex at home is ridiculous. There are millions of teens who refrain from having sex everyday. They refrain even though they want to have sex. Its comes down to self control and the will to resist peer pressure. Too many parents allow their teens to do and say whatever they want. They don't teach their teens that there is an appropriate time and place for things. They just give in to their teen's impulsive behavior. Just because you think that your teen is determined to so something, doesn't mean that you give in and allow it to happen. Part of parenting is providing guidance.
If you are considering allowing your teen to have sex in your home, make sure you check your state's laws regarding the age for statutory rape. Some states dictate that someone of a certain age cannot legally consent to having sex. Do you see why this is a bad idea?