I have never been married, nor have I ever been engaged. But I do know that if I were to partake in such a sacred bond, I would hope to have what Lisa and Francis Chan have: A devout love for one another because they love God first and keep his mission in mind as the road map for their lives.
Therefore, I still desire "the representation of what I witness lived out in other people" or "this ideal" because I see that it is, in fact quite possible.
When two people have in mind the things of God, then there will really be no division among them because there is one "Spirit and God will lead [each couple] in the same direction. Whenever we fight with our spouses, one of us is not walking in the Spirit." - Francis Chan
Galatians 5:16: "If you walk in the Spirit, you won't carry out the desires of the flesh.
Francis and Lisa's combined lessons— "Christ-Centered Relationships Part 1-3" — gives so much perspective on what God initially intended for marriage. Marriage is not for all of your needs, desires and wants to be met. That's God's job, though God can surely meet your needs through the love of a spouse.
No, marriage is an extension of laying down your life for one another as Christ laid down his life for the church.
In doing so God's plan for marriage will be attractive to the world and will win people over for the gospel.
1 Timothy 4:16:
"Watch your life and doctrine closely. Persevere in them, because if you do, you will save both yourself and your hearers."
Lisa says in the video that there are only two responses she has seen to marital conflict over the 18 years she has been counseling married women: to either respond in pride or humility.
"Pride leads to destruction. The prideful person is defensive, angry, blame-shifting, selfish, not concerned about the goal of the gospel. The humble person, on-the-other-hand is broken over his/her own sin. They are more concerned about honoring God than they are about their own rights and what they deserve. And they are trying, by the grace of God, to stay focused on the gospel and the goal." - Lisa Chan
"God opposes the proud but shows favor to the humble.”
According to this scripture, Lisa says "God responds actively against you when you respond in pride, but the opposite is true when you respond in humility; his grace will flow unto you."
And as we serve God and are focused on the things of God and his mission—not our own—awesome things happen.
"God's agenda is to transform you, and to give you grace every time you humble yourself before him," Lisa said.
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