Ok, everyone, here it is, the White Sox prospect ranking you’ve all been waiting for. Pitching tools like fastball velocity and mechanics are overrated; we all know the best way to evaluate pitchers in the minor leagues is by the quality of their pitchface. What emotion are they putting forth? How funny do they look? Are they in pain? We tackle the big questions here.
11. Jordan Guerrero
We're easing into it. None of us could reasonably expect to look any more composed in this situation. The face is an important part of throwing a baseball, and the resigned grimace is understandable. This is a pretty typical pitchface, and we thank Jordan Guerrero for making it.
10. Michael Kopech
What really stands out about Kopech's pitchface is the composure. He doesn't look like someone about to throw 101 mph, but he is. Somehow, he just manages to look less dumb doing it than everyone else. Maybe that's just part of being a top prospect.
If Guerrero has a grimace and Kopech flashes the Blue Steel, here's a third variety of pitchface: cheeks-puffed-out-trepidation. Who among us cannot empathize? Stephens truly represents the everyman, at least here.
8. Tyler Danish
Tyler Danish hopes this ball goes where he wants it to go, and so do we. The eyebrow arch may serve the purpose of intimidating it towards this end. This is a look of anticipation.
7. Ian Hamilton
Did Hamilton mean to throw this ball? Given the situation, we must assume that he did. But what a look. It's as if he stepped into an H.P. Lovecraft story and suddenly found himself eye-to-eye with a nameless, ageless horror and was forever changed by what he saw. Are there traces of regret? Panic? It's hard to say.
6. Dane Dunning
Here we have a cheeks-puffed remix. Perhaps blowing on the ball right after it leaves your fingertips adds that crucial 0.001 miles per hour needed for the whiff. Dunning's goggle specs also add to this. More players should wear glasses and we are not biased about this.
The specs! The intensity! The effort! The head tilt! It's possible that one day Dunning and Fulmer will pitch in the same game for the Sox, and it will be so hard to tell them apart by means other than context clues. Truly, a golden era awaits for glasses-wearing Sox fans. Pitchers. Glasses-wearing Sox pitchers.
4. Matt Purke
There's a lot going on here, and it's all good. The glasses awakening continues. The stache adds bravura and general atmosphere. The squint challenges you to swing, just try it. This is what baseball looked like in the days of the Wild West, probably.
Giolito's had an up-and-down year, but one thing remains consistent. Also notable in this picture is his elbow. What's happening there? Does that just happen when people pitch? His skeleton is moving too fast for his skin to keep up. What a horrifying thought. Ok, we're deviating here.
Chicago's potential next hot-ticket call-up could be this face, and it's easy to see why. That makes the Sox three for three when it comes to returns on the Adam Eaton trade; that crafty Hahn move netted the team several major-league ready pitchfaces in Dunning, Giolito, and Lopez. The Rickhahnaissance continues.
1. Alec Hansen
Could it be anyone else? Hansen is not only the top White Sox pitchface prospect, he's one of the elites of professional baseball. There's nothing I can add here. Just appreciate it. In fact, here are a few bonus pictures of Hansen...
***Note on the Hansen photos - they were taken by our own Kim Contreras, and friend of the site Michael Grennell. They can all be used elsewhere with our permission, as long as they are properly credited as you see above.
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