Grief is a human process whose authority is not within the conscious grasp of the person who experiences it. The invisible operator within our psyches decides when we are strong enough to break down ... without breaking down all the way.
When we surrender to breakdown, remembering it as part of the cycle of death and rebirth, both within ourselves and with others, then we can breakthrough to another level of awareness and integration. Without that belief, depression can result and medication can prolong our breakdown and prevent breakthrough.
This process is true not only of grief, but of our everyday experience on a planet who is Herself in death-throws, before the rebirth of the emerging epoch. It is often precisely when we feel "in the flow" and "on top of the world" that something unlikely occurs - with an intensity and timing that feels more than we can bear. Often when clients report these events, I intuitively See a long line of other lifetimes or ancestral patterns, waiting to be cleared by the my client's choice to surrender and face a fear or deep sadness.
If things get intense for you, stay with the feelings and ask "where in my body do I feel this?" "What kind of feeling is this?" and "What does this remind me of?" Stay there. Eventually, a familiar image may arise and remind you of simple but powerful words, such as "abandonment", or "betrayal".
The paradox of healing comes when you stay with yourself... because, in this instance, you are "staying with abandonment"....try it.