Vampires and Emotional Boundaries

Maybe Vapires are so popular because they represent how we play out our most persistent, unconscious acts. Let me tell you what I mean.

Publicity portrait of Canadian actor Jonathon Frid, as the vampire character Barnabas Collins on the American television series 'Dark Shadows,' a metal-tipped cane in his hands and his fangs bared, late 1960s. (Photo by Pictorial Parade/Getty Images)

A client, Jamie, was extremely helpful to her family. Since she was the eldest, and was a care giver/helper type, her four siblings treated her as another parent, rather than a sibling, excluding her from the fun and inside jokes.  

Her whole life Jamie was loyal, stoically disregarding her hurt feelings at being excluded, and at being the butt of jokes and jabs from siblings. Interestingly, Jamie's struggles to stay loyal despite personal sadness, brought her unexpected benefits of learning to deal with others who are negative and/or very different from herself. Eventually, that loyalty also caused her to feel a victim without recourse. 
She began to organize her thoughts and life around self pity, giving her siblings credit for being better than she, which is the message they were sending. This extended to the close relationships she developed, where she attracted someone who looked like he would take care of her, but then eventually, she would become the care giver and/or rescuer.

This is how our inner Vampire can find its way to the light and deplete us of our life blood.
When unconsciously play out  a childhood role in which we were valued, we drink that blood that satisfies us that we were wanted and felt alive with the needs of others. Afterward, we will also feel the inevitable deep disappointment in the darkness, as another part of us wonders why we somehow can't just be loved for who we are. 
When Jamie and I worked energetically, it was clear that her soul lesson included assessing the price of loyalty over self-love. The only way to drive a stake in the heart of that Vampire was to understand that loyalty did not keep her alive, it only assured her Vampire was fed.
By the end, Jamie was able to say "I love my family. I like each person in my family. I don't like the way they treat me. I am not obligated to tend to their needs anymore, nor do I want to be in their company." Loyalty ended and Jamie knew that stake would finanlly stop the Vampire's thirst.
Jamie felt free for the first time in her life. Now she could apply the lessons she learned from being loyal and staying in a challenging situation to other parts of her life, leaving the source and pain of that learning behind.

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