Okay guys this topic isn't new, but unfortunately like other things that we believe should have died with the great jheri curl still have staying power. The other day a friend on Facebook put up a status about black women being angry when they see a black man with a white woman. Of course this status garnered the usual responses. They always have to take all of our good black men! Black men are threatened by a confident black woman. He can't handle me...etc.etc. All of the possible reasons one could come up with to justify what I believe is a very inappropriate reaction were mentioned. Allow me to share a different perspective.
What amazed me about this post was that not one "defender" of the Angry Black Woman's Crusade Against Black Men Dating White Women brought up the possibility of accountability for their actions and feelings. They either justified them by saying that the white woman was an insecure doormat, or that the black man thought more highly of white women than black women. The historical implications that a union like this signifies cannot be ignored. America's rich history of imposing a sense of royalty and superiority on white women over other races is not up for debate. But what can be focused on is how we react to and access the things that we see.
If you're one of those black women that gets angry at the sight of jungle fever, first explore the reasons WHY you feel the way you do about the situation. I challenge you to do something that is very difficult. Go inside of yourself and access YOUR insecurities about the current setting. Is it really that the man can't "handle" you and wants a "doormat" (I happen to know quite a few very strong assertive white women btw) or is it that you feel that you're not good enough for him? Is he really choosing her because he thinks she's better than you because she's white or is it that YOU think she's better than you? Another thing: stop assuming that a black man who is with a white woman is a "good one." How do you know how good of a man he is? He could just be a bum with a white girlfriend and in that case she did you a favor! Granted there are some black men out there who do view white women as trophies, doormats and any other thing besides an equal partner; but to generalize and apply those labels to undeserving black men everytime you see them with a white woman is just plain rude. While it has its challenges, love is blind and grand and pure and fascinating. Let's focus on seeing it as such and not ruin it by imposing our harsh generalizations strictly because of someone's race. Besides don't you think the KKK has that covered? Til next time, good luck and good love.
Filed under: Love and Relationships