Jesse Jackson Jr. gets 30 months for impersonating a public servant

With great sadness, The FluffingtonPost bids bon voyage to one of its favorite public servants: Congressman Jesse Jackson Jr. (D-IL) Wait... Is "bon voyage" appropriate for getting sent up the river?

Regardless, Junior will be missed. No one can spice up a dusty old campaign scandal quite the way he can. First there was the walking around with a Batman belt buckle; then the midlife crisis karate training; then his dance with that devilish Elvis impersonator (Blago); then the midlife crisis relapse with the “restaurant hostess” mistress; then the bold move of taking a 165-day leave of absence from already not doing his elected job; then the list of things he illegally spent his $750,000 in campaign cash on (a Build-A-Build Workshop, really?).

The good news is although Junior was sentenced to 30 months, he should get out in 15 since his bi-polar personalities will serve the sentence concurrently. But unknown at press time was whether they would get separate cells or fight over who gets the bottom bunk.

Until that’s sorted out, here’s a look back at The FluffPost’s satiric coverage that almost won it a public interest Peabody. (Okay, not really. I'm lying like a Jackson now.)

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Jesse Jackson Junior billboard

Filed under: Humor

Tags: Jesse Jackson Jr., Pure Chicago

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    SkitSketchJeff is Jeff Burdick, who is a comedy writer, thumb-wrestling cut man, and aspiring Futurist. Also authors the #OnThisDate Alternate Almanac on Twitter. Contact

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