Top 10 Derrick Rose Excuses

Chicago Bulls Derrick Rose skipped his teammates’ victory last night over the Los Angeles Clippers. The Bulls injury report initially listed the cause of absence as a restless night’s sleep at his 3,102-square foot Trump Tower condo...

Good-bye Chicago: 10 T’ings I Won’t Miss

Mayor Emanuel says Chicago is “a world-class city with world-class infrastructure.” Then why does the Kennedy Expressway shrink for 5½ miles (from Montrose to Cumberland) to three lanes in either direction? This might work for a suburban artery serving strip malls and Applebees, but for getting in and out of one of the world’s busiest airports? Not world class.
As The FluffingtonPost leaves Chicago to start a new chapter in Los Angeles, my feelings are mixed. On the one hand, Chicago has been my home for multiple decades. My parents live here. My childhood memories took root here. On the other hand, local corruption and the deterioration of all local public institutions bring to... Read more »

Cubs fans cheer “We’ve got Ricketts!”

Stealing a page from Sister Teresa, Cubs owner Tom Ricketts beamed positivity at his annual spring training kickoff news conference by proclaiming the Cubs playoff contenders...

On this date: Alternate Almanac is born

Almanacs are an odd breed. They’re usually antiquated the very day of publication, as that’s the first day their weather forecasts are proven wrong...

Top 10 Super Bowl predictions

Super Bowl Sunday and reckless sports wagering seem as perfectly paired as a Real Housewives marathon and white trash wedding planning. In Vegas...

Cubs GM Jed Hoyer quits over new mascot

With the Chicago Cubs’ naming of “Clark,” a cute caricature bear, as the new team mascot, General Manager Jed Hoyer has resigned. Team president Theo Epstein was stunned by Hoyer’s exit, believing more than enough room exists in the organization for two mascots...

2013 in Review: 10 funniest posts not leaked by Edward Snowden

Most year-in-review pieces leave much to be desired by us at The Fluff. Yes, they provide a broad look back at national and global events. Or in the case of Dennis Rodman – a galactic view...

2013 in Review: The Fluff’s 10 funniest images

From “The Week That Will Be – in Jokes #2” (Aug. 23)
What better way for a 2013 in review than through its images. After all, they say a picture is worth a thousand words, but given the going blog rate of $0.00/word, the ratio is fairly arbitrary ratio. After all, this would also mean that 17 words or a 3,500 pictures would also be worth roughly the same...

Is New Yorker caption contest judged by troglodytes?

When the film reviewer Roger Ebert passed in April, longer tributes noted his devotion to the weekly New Yorker caption contest. I enjoyed knowing we had this in common. The New Yorker even posted...

Bears weather delay leaves 12 players with injured groins

While NFL officials congratulated themselves for suspending the Bears-Raven game out of safety concerns, a dozen Bears still suffered torn groin muscles during the weather delay...
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    SkitSketchJeff is Jeff Burdick, who is a comedy writer, thumb-wrestling cut man, and aspiring Futurist. Also authors the #OnThisDate Alternate Almanac on Twitter. Contact

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