After seeing one too many starving-actress-celebrities this summer, I have no choice but to bring back the Scary Skinny List. Why? Because someone needs to state the obvious, which is that these women look emaciated. And since their teeny tiny bodies have become the standard by which many of us measure ourselves, I’m going to be the whistleblower who calls them – and us – out on it.
New York Housewives Aviva Drescher and Carole Radziwill
New Yorkers Aviva and Carole may have breathed some fresh air into the pathetically addictive Bravo franchise, but they’ve also managed to reduce the average BMI among the Housewives exponentially. Every time I see these gals on the screen I wince and look away, much like I did back in the ’90s when Ally McBeal showed us that women could rock the workforce, as long as we do it in a size 00. I’m psyched that Aviva’s raising awareness about disabled children and that Carole’s showing the world that widows are more than objects of our pity. I just wish they didn’t look like so skeletal while doing it.
You can check out Aviva's picture here on the Bravo website.
Princess Kate Middleton
Oh, yes, Princess Kate is back on my Scary Skinny List, in part because her itty bitty frame was everywhere this summer; the Olympics, Wimbledon, knighting ceremonies, Will’s birthday shindig, the Trouping the Colours Ceremony (whatever the heck that is) and even visiting the underprivileged. Oh, now I get it. Kate’s so busy she doesn’t have time to eat.
Look, I agree with the rest of the world that she’s rockin’ the whole princess thing. And I think her fashion sense is top notch. But let’s be honest: even a shag rug would look fabulous on someone who makes a store mannequin look chubby. What a royal bummer it is to see the tremendous pressure of being the most photographed woman in the world right there on her wee little body.
Host Kelly Ripa
Ah, Kelly. Sweet, nice, fun, cheery, girl-next-door Kelly. We all know her. We all love her. So, in the spirit of such love, can I ask why this mom of three has removed every remnant of womanliness from her body? Soon after her last pregnancy, I remember watching her pull a disappearing act, until all that was left were the bones and biceps we're seeing today. I’ve heard she’s really into exercise and I think that being a jock is super cool. But I can't help but wonder if her leaner than lean body is due to the fact that she's under the watchful eye of a public that mercilessly weighs in on her appearance each and every day.
So there you have it, August's Scary Skinny List. Someday I hope we'll get over our obsession to look like these women. If you're one of the lucky ladies who is unaffected by the media's oohing and ahhing over emaciated models, actresses and other public figures. I applaud you. And I envy you, almost as much as I envy them.