Did Sandusky's and Sanchez's Wives Know About the Abuse? I Say Yes.

Did Sandusky's and Sanchez's Wives Know About the Abuse?  I Say Yes.

Another alleged victim took the stand today in the Jerry Sandusky sex abuse trial in Pennsylvania. And five days ago, a video surfaced showing Anthony Sanchez, a California water agency official, striking his stepson during a game of catch in his backyard. For parents, these stories send a dagger of fear through our hearts and force us re-assess the methods we’re using to keep our kids safe. For me, it begs another question: Where the f*ck are the wives?

Let’s start with Sandusky. He traveled with the kids who were entrusted to his care, showered with them, and even hosted many of these boys in his home. In his home. If what he’s been charged with has any truth to it, then I have no doubt the sexual abuse he engaged in took place under his roof as well as on the road.

And if the accusations are true, I have no doubt his wife Dottie Sandusky knew something was up. Maybe she didn’t know exactly what was going on or see it for herself. But you can’t be married to someone for decades, have a day-to-day and/or sexual relationship with that person, and not know that your partner is engaging in behaviors that may be harming others. There are clues. There are always clues.

What could those signs have been? Perhaps she noticed that Sundusky was disinterested in sex or was more aroused during positions where she was submissive. Out of the bedroom, she had to have noticed that he was spending too much time alone with young boys. She had to have even felt reluctance entering the basement, where he was often alone with them. Not surprisingly, I just read today on ABCnews.com that one victim called out to Dottie Sandusky for help from that basement. He got no response.

In my opinion, if he’s found guilty then she’s also committed a crime and should be charged accordingly.

Next up we have Anthony Sanchez, the assh*le who beat his stepson during a game of catch. Watching the video made me sick to my stomach, perhaps because I know all too well what can happen when your mother or father brings a new monster, I mean partner, into the home. Again, I have to ask: where the hell is the wife?

Although I imagine it’s difficult to blend a family, I can’t understand how parents can bring new people into their children’s lives without any set of rules or ideas about how their children should be treated. How can a mother or father (yes, dads are guilty of this, too, trust me) watch another person strike or mistreat her/his child and think that this behavior is acceptable? My guess, watching the video, is that the little boy isn’t the only one on the receiving end of Sanchez’s blows.

And in my opinion – which you can take or leave – she should either leave the home or be charged along with her husband.

Unless you’re a complete idiot, I shouldn't have to tell you that children of divorce go through hell. Even in the most amicable of situations, the transition from one household to two can be rough. So for all of you moms and dads out there who add even more damage and duress by bringing nasty people into your kids’ lives, I’ve got news for you: you suck.

That’s my rant for the day. Maybe for the week, since it was such a big one. Yes, I think Dottie Sandusky was aware of her husband’s inappropriate relationships with those boys. And I think Sanchez’s wife allowed him to abuse her son. What we will do about these sad situations, if anything, remains to be seen.

If you want to learn more about keeping your kids safe, check out this article on Families in the Loop by Chicago social worker, Michelle Siegman.


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    My rage is not only against vile scum-bag pedophile "Piece-of-Crap-Sandusky", I am equally outraged at his wife, his #1 loyal coconspirator and supporter.

    Most certainly, Mrs. Sandusky enabled her Piece-of-Crap husband by choosing to turn a blind's eye to obvious warning signs while she fulfilled her significant role
    as the dutiful loyal wife providing the appearance of a healthy safe home environment where these heinous crimes of sexual abuse and rape were committed against children.

    Mr. Piece-of-Crap- Sandusky's coconspirator played her role as a naive, deaf, dumb and blind, unconscious brain-dead wife. Her presence in their home was required as a "cover" to influence parents of the soon-to-be-victim-boys. This fake-safe-set-up scheme planned by the sexual pedophile perpetrator husband with the cooperation his willing or brain-dead coconspirator wife was necessary to carry out Mr. Piece-of-Crap-Sandusky's heinous crimes against children.

    I can't fathom what coconspirators like Mrs. Piece-of-Crap-Sandusky do to rationalize and justify their cooperative role in these crimes. However, what I do know is she chose to ignore all the easily perceived and apparent warning signs and red flags; she chose to ignore and not pay close attention to her husband's most obvious inappropriate behavior with boys.

    To make matters worse, Mrs. Piece-of-Crap stood by her man, Mr. Piece-of-Crap, in court each day. Worse still, after she witnessed and heard all the horrific irrefutable testimony of many of Mr. Piece-of-Crap's victims in court, and her own son's testimony, Mrs. Piece-of-Crap chose to still stand by her man, a vile pedophile who willfully sexually abused countless victims. Now she loyally visits him in jail.

    I hold Mrs. Piece-of-Crap just as responsible for these vile heinous crimes perpetrated against children as Mr. Piece-of-Crap. Also, she's no better or worse than far too many of other mother's/wives, like herself, who were present in the homes where their own children were sexually abused by their husbands and did
    nothing to protect their victimized children. Instead, just like Mrs. Piece-of-Crapthey, these sort of mother's are self-serving and choose to betray and abandon the needs of their victimized children and instead align themselves with their man.

    Shame on Mrs. Piece-of-Crap-Sandusky for her role in these heinous crimes!

    This horrible scenario is yet another example of patriarchy epitomized!

    Bravo! to Matt for his awakened conscience and courage to tell the truth about his father's dark filthy secrets and his own sexual abuse. Hooray for all the victims! Let the healing begin!

  • In reply to Artemis Rose:

    I hear and share your outrage, Artemis Rose. How could she not know that children were being abused right under her nose?

    And in situations like Matt Sundusky's and Sanchez's, I'll never understand how a parent can let someone hurt her child and not doing anything about it.

    I'm so glad you let out your frustration and anger here. Helps me get some of my own out, too. Not all, since there's a mountain-full, but definitely enough for now.

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