It's been long journey for me to heal. Therapy, drug use, 12-step recovery meetings, regular church attendance, and countless sermons and books have finally gotten me to a safe space to take my spirituality to the next level.
It's exhilarating and scary.
I'm not afraid of boogeymen men or ghosts, but sometimes I think we can become fearful about WHO we are becoming. You ever felt like you didn't want to be the super deep super spiritual person? Well, I think that's who I'm becoming, minus the strong patchouli oil, and I'm okay with it.
Turning 50 this year really did something to me. I have finally gotten to the place where I recognize I no longer need to practice unhealthy thoughts and behaviors that don't serve me.
I feel free!
So today while working on my first of many spiritual self-help books, I played healing soaking music as I wrote, and the frequency of the music did more than calm my nerves and create a Platonic effect on my writing ability. I was beyond inspired. I felt connected to Source Energy. I felt close to God.
This feeling inspired me to take a bath, but it was no ordinary event. I envisioned the water healing me as I soaked my sore muscles from all the exercise classes I teach. The healing waters permeated my muscles and restored more than just my physical state. I imagined myself sitting within God's love, peace, and grace being bathed, then swaddled like a baby with my bath towel.
Afterwards, out of nowhere, I just stood and looked at myself in the mirror and began to speak affirmations to myself. Not affirmations about success or positivity, just loving, kind thoughts to ME. It was like my own spiritual Avatar moment like the connection the human had with the extraterrestrial. To myself I affirmed: I see you.
I've done many things but I'd never done that.
As I gazed within my own set of eyes, I began to tell myself all the things that I so desperately longed to hear from others all my life, be it friends, lovers, employers, family--whomever. Then I went further by telling myself that I forgave myself for all the mistakes I'd made, and it is okay.
Mirror work may be new for me, but believe it or not, I can already feel the rejuvenation and peace it provides. I know I am knew to this, but I am grateful for all the teachers and spiritual guides I've had to empower me along the journey, but mostly for the love of God who has been orchestrating my entire life for such a time as this.
As I told myself during mirror work:
I love you.
I see you.
I forgive you.
I am proud of you.
Everything is going to be okay.
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About Me: I'm a wife and mom of six daughters known as "The Fitness Evangelist" because of my ability to take ordinary fitness classes and turn them into worshipful experiences. I have graduate degrees in Writing and Exercise Science and Health Promotion, and I'm also a certified fitness instructor through the Aerobics and Fitness Association of America. I can speak on entrepreneurship because I help people with their health and fitness goals any where in the world through my business with Total Life Changes. For more information about me, you can visit my website at http://elanainspires.com or go directly to my TLC website for product information http://totallifechanges.com/elanainspires. IBO #8154411.